Im pretty mad today, bare with me

It seemed like only yesterday Mariah was slinging her plastic kitty around town trying to convince her fans (who still haven't noticed that it is no longer 1995) to buy E=MC2 which if you have read some of previous posts will know that that album title is makes no sense at all, but i won't go into that.

So now Mariah has managed to finish a new record produced by none other than senor midget himself, she has released a brand new single called Obsessed. Being the Beyonce' stan that I am it is taking every ounce of stregnth in my Creole body not to scream "BITER" but i wont because there are more important issues at hand.
If Mariah thinks this song is going to convince anybody that Eminem didn't piss on her, then her mind is as fucked up as her live singing, the lyrics in the song clearly contradict themselves, for example how is it possible that "noone here even mentions your name" but at the same time is "a conversation" and if "i don't even know who you are" how the hell did you know that he was "in LA but i'm out in Jermaine's."
If you ask me, i think that Janet Jackson wrote this song to sabotage Mariah for being the only artist Janet's boyfriend actually makes money off OR Mariah was too busy injecting her face with duck cum to notice that she was singing total shit.
I'm sure she thinks she's showing her loyalty to that irrelevant skinny ass husband of hers by getting at the man who claims to have pissed on her and even though I hate Eminem just as much as the next intelligent person, Mariah does herself no favours by even acknowledging what Eminem has been saying about her, in fact all she does is tarnish her icon status by becoming as petty and as childish as a d-list disstrack artist like Keri Hilson.
Mariah's problem is this- whilst trying to be down the kids she is actually cheapening herself by using slang made for hoodrats like Keisha Cole and Monica. I really dont know who Mariah is trying to appeal to, especially as i dont get how someone who loved Vision of Love can find the patience to listen to lifeless and meaningless urban shit like Obsessed. We all know how this album will pan out, a big single, impressive first week sales and then a sudden fall off the charts followed by the release of singles that only BET will agree to play.


In other news lets talk about Wale. All i have to say is that if you made me close my eyes, I would bet $2000 that it was SantiGold and not Lady Gaga who is on that track and id bet a further $300000000 that Lady Gaga only appeared on the track because of business and not because she enjoys the music of him. This is the problem with new artists who try and use popular artists to generate a buzz for their own music, IT RARELY WORKS. Because the second you dont have any colloborations, nobody will care about what you have to say no matter how hard you try to convince your management to not kick your ass out in the cold streets of the F-List.

Ok guys, so let's talk about something that has been bothering me.
I started a job 5 years ago and basically in the first year i looked really good but i dissapointed my boss by not doing anything at all and basically embarrasing myself, but because my boss has a thing for no talent hacks (he is one himself) he didn't fire me. However it came to my attention a few months ago that i could be fired so I started letting my boss put his powerful eel into my untalented cave so i could insure myself against be fired, it worked and now i have a new album out:

http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://blackstarnews.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/diddy_cassie.jpg&imgrefurl=http://blackstarnews.com/blog/%3Fp%3D680&usg=__9HzVk5Fu7ab_vEmQ_RGPRsj4LfY=&h=365&w=365&sz=40&hl=en&start=2&um=1&tbnid=_R4XCpu5p5vXNM:&tbnh=121&tbnw=121&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dcassie%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26um%3D1

Now that everyone knows what i did, they ridicule me even harder than they did before, commenting on my lack of vocal talent and my rhythm deficiency, the compare me to other artists who cant sing or dance but would do a good job on America's Next Top Failed Pop Artist Turned Model for which Ciara is currently the host of.

Here is a run down of episode 1:
The remaining 6 failed pop artists must complete a runway challenge where they must balance ten copies of Tina Knowles best selling autobiographies "Mein Razor" on their heads whilst holding 50 unsold copies of Ciara's Fantasy Ride in each hand whilst being whipped by Clive Davis and the executives of their respective labels as they catwalk on the broken pieces of Janet Jackson's Damita Jo, 20 Y.o and Discipline records.
Bow Wow won the challenge and was allowed to pick one friend to join him to go backstage at the VMAs to clean up the cum stains Diddy left all over Cassie's dressing room carpet which she is sharing with entire cast of Making Da Unsuccesful Band and I Want To Be Humiliated By An UnTalented Rapper Named After A Brand of Confectionary Doughnuts.