Once upon a time there was a young girl. For the sake of this story (which has a clear yet annoyingly ambigous moral behind it) let's call this young girl "M". When M first came out, M was the shit. M could sang, M was hitting notes so high even the Angel Gabriele was getting down to M's jams. M was hitting notes so high and so unique that even Whitney-The Queen of High had to take off her $0.99 wig to her.
Then shit happened. M lost her damn mind (which is debateable as some question whether M really had a mind to begin with). M started doing shit like putting on lots of weight all unannounced and shit, M started making up fictional characters during interviews and shit (Sasha Fierce is an altergo not a fictional character, so shut the fuck up). M then did some more crazy ass shit then dissapeared, and whilst she was gone we got a lot of new artists and even saw the making of a few icons, some of who are still icons, some of who drag their tired vaginas around an elaborate stage everynight in order to pay child support to a dead beat money hungry ex husband.
When M came back everybody was excited, her music was new, fresh, sexy, hot, but M wasn't sanging like she used to, instead M became Obsessed with whispering, and then even took to lip-synching which led to M having high first week sales and then seeing her records slide slowly off the charts like diarrhea sliding down Usher's greasy face, then she got married to an d-lister, a hood rat icon, a motherfucking irrelevant and then M decided to get brave by confronting a particular dude who claims to have given M a golden shower. The song sucks but because M has such loyal fans who haven't seem to noticed that there is big difference between the M of today and the M of the 90s, the song will get to number 1. for a while until one of ItGirls releases a single which will dethrone M's song. The M will release four other singles that nobody will care about.
Confused?
Perplexed?
Take a gander at this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLTdr2xnFLA&opt_out_ackd=1&persist_gl=1&gl=US
No comments:
Post a Comment