The Douglas/Harris Centre For The Development Of .....

Is your career flopping harder than an 87 year old man who has run out of little blue pills.

When you announce you're releasing a new record- do Makael and Skorpion burst out into laughter and then sigh.

Was your last hit single released before Effie at all the cakes in DreamGirls.

Is your name T-Boz?

If so, then welcome to The Douglas/Harris Centre For The Development Of... - a foundation created by Sister Douglas (the mother of Eddie Monster) and Mrs. Harris (the proud of mother of the first pre-op transexual in Contemporary R'n'b Music)

The Centre- which is based in lower Yugoslavia was founded after both mother's realised the careers of their daughters were going nowhere after 2004 and decided to help other fallen "divas".
At the Douglas/Harris Centre expert advice and care is provided to the artists of the world who have faced either a lack of fan belief, record label belief or self belief. We also provide an after care service- which includes:

1. Accompanying artists to The Bet Awards and consoling them as they watch Rihanna spend all the money set aside for their album on an elaborate set and recycled hair cuts.

2. Assisting artists in getting jobs on Hot 97 so they can air their ignorant views on Beyonce' and other artists more succesful than themselves.

3. Getting them small cameo appearances in the music videos of rappers who are just as unfortunate as themselves.

Past and Present Artists Who Have Spent Much Needed Time At The Centre Are:

1. Miss Jones (who was at the time Miss Jones In The Evening due to her insatiable love for midnight snacks)
2. T-Boz
3. Chilli (Left Eye actually got to release solo material)
4. Brandy
5. Monica
6. Cam'ron
7. The Vandellas of Martha and The Vandellas.
8. Tweet
9. Blu Cantrell
10. Meagan Rochelle
11. Mya
12. Sheila E.
13. All three members of Vanity 6.
14. Paula Abdul
15. LaToya Jackson
16. Mario
17. Bow Wow
18. Lil Romeo
19. Rock Steady Cru
20. Shontelle (To enter ending of August)
21. Billy Ocean
22. Betty River
23. Beatrice Waterfall


We also equip our clients with the neccesary skills to survive Beyonceitis such as a list of things NOT to say in an interview with Pride Magazine such as:

"Singers should stick to singing so embarrasing actors like me can get some much needed attention because my mortgage needs paying"

We also show our clients the consequences of such ass backwards comments:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufltlRgREoY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4WXuqpiM4U&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_EPgzAa98c&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLXDMOfDgXc&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lg451hKIIo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ToH-2Qfy5I&feature=fvsr