Oh No You Diddy'nt

1. Twitter takes away all the mystery that an artist once had from an artist.
2. You're shit at what you do.

I'll just get straight into it. Today as I was making my way to a friends party and sitting in a traffic, I put in the last Danity Kane record and realised that these bitches were damn good. So good that with the right management and direction they could have been an internationally respected group since The PussyCat Dolls have less artistic credibility than Milli Vanilli and Yung Berg put together.
But you see, when you're signed to Bad Boy all you are is a symbol, a symbol of Diddy's wealth, Diddy doesn't care whether the symbol is succesful or not- we know this because Cassie still has a job- but yes- all you are is a symbol of Diddy's "empire" when you are signed to Bad Boy.

The reason Diddy needs so many shows and artists is because without them people would be forced to actually evaluate his own credibility as a rapper, but because to mainstream media Diddy is one of the "fathers" of Hip Hop alongside Jay Z, mainstream media are never even going to bother questioning the pure foolishness which is Diddy's lyrical content because he such as a good "business man."

Now- if you want to talk about a good business man you don't have to look any further than Jay Z. You see- everyone knows Jay Z is talented whether or not some chump thinks he's an old ass nigger but like his wife- Jay Z has become more than just a good rapper- he's become an empire.
Look at the artists that he's signed:
Rihanna- The World's Biggest Pop Star.
Kanye- (Genius.)

Now Jay Z has his faults, dropping teenage girls without even having the decency to let them know himself but when he does work at something he gets it right, he's become so succesful that people dont even realise when his singles chart poorly like the singles he's released this year, but it's cool but he has artistic intergrity.

Diddy however is only good at marketing a caricature of himself- anyone remember when he tried to convince us he was from Harlem? You see- there is a name for people who come from wealthy circumstances but are ashamed of it:




Jackasses.

The only good thing Diddy is good at promoting are his external businesses- such as the clothing line and "cologne". If he was good at promoting his artists, Day 26 wouldn't be so familiar with the set of 106 and Park, Cassie wouldn't look like such a fool and Danity Kane would still be together.

And when it comes to the BIG movie.
What fuckery.
Trying to present Biggie Smalls as some unsuspecting rapper who got caught up in drama because of a huge "misunderstanding". You may have been able to fool his mother but you won't fool an audience who know how big your ego is.
Trying to convince a younger audience that Tupac was overreacting to situations obviously orchestrated by Biggie nothing short of filthy.
And so is trying to present Faith Evans as the angel to Lil Kim's devil.
Lil Kim may have been a hoe but Faith Evans was no nun, everyone knows that she was serving the kitty ice cold to Tupac and yet the film behaves as though "it was all a big misunderstanding".

Oh the fuckery.

You can't rap.
And any mystery you had died the second you signed up for Twitter because now people know that you know what they think about you- like how even Stephen Hawkins has a better flow than you.


Cassie:
Yes you can't sing.
And yes- everyone knows your little interracial pussy is the reason you're still signed but with the right management you could be a huge star, it's not like the lack vocal ability is holding any of these other bitches back.
With your look and your lifeless voice you could see your music enter the top ten and become a respected face.
You need to work on some POP MUSIC, where people unfortuenately don't expect much from their stars.
You need to get in the studio with cheap producers and high profile writers so you can save some money and use the money that you saved to put out 15 videos and singles to maximise the chances of you getting to number 1 on some chart.

That's what you need to do.
Day 26 (sigh) Get rid of the fat one. Put in a slim one, get new management, get a new label and be the amazing men that you are.

Red Cafe- you stay where you are. You belong where you are.