There's only two types of whores out there, the ones that blog online... and the ones that are scared.
Hello my little Pussy Holes, it's Pop Whore (claws fingers and emulates kitten on heat). I've been away so long trying to get on For The Love of Ray J, but since I haven't got a penis and my ass hole's pretty tight I didn't make the cut.
So yesterday, I was chilling at Keri Hilson's crib reciting the National Anthem when I heard more about this Kat Stacks character and I decided that I owed it to my Pussy Holes to inseminate them with my cock filled with fierce semen to satisfy their needs with this log about her.
First of all, this needs to be said about all whores- a whore can't be a whore without dicks to explore. For those amongst you who fall under the basic bitch category, that means that unless men give it up, a whore cant suck it up and so if you're going to hate on the whore you better be spewing hate on the guy who makes her whoredom possible.
To me, Kat Stacks like Superhead before her is doing the world a favour, by exposing hip hop culture for what it really is, a thick pile of Gabourey Sidibe's shit. People have nothing to say when Trey Songz wants to convince us that his dick can make a bitch wanna buy him a shortset and some of you idiots found a way to rationalise Chris Brown thumping the shit out of Miss Fenty AND when that cum stained piano player was found out to be bumping uglies with that married producer whose nose looks like he can't believe oxygen is free.
If this Kat "Google Me" Stacks has shit to say about your favourite rappers you need to listen up, because she knows them and YOU DO NOT.
Calling her a hoe is like telling Katy Perry that her career died the second Gaga's Italian cooch hit our screens- she already knows.
These rappers promote homophobia, sexism and the degradation of women when in reality they're all as soft as getting brain from the Cookie Monster and so whenever someone comes out and exposes them for who they really are, I welcome it because it's neccesary.
Will I be buying her book? No. She couldnt put a grammatically correct sentence together even if her worn out pussy lips depended on it, but will I routing for her? YES I WILL.
(See how I did that entire post WITHOUT calling anybody irrelevant).
And some of you wanted me to talk about Ricky Martin being gay.
I'll make this one short:
Until mothers and fathers start expecting their straight kids to declare that they are straight, they should not expect their gay kids to declare that they are gay.
It doesn't help or hinder anything, as long as you know whether you lick the cooter or stick the cooter, that's all that matters.
Ricky is only interested in being gay ever since he heard they were making a Spanish version of Paris is Burning.
That is all.
Thursday, 1 April 2010
Wednesday, 24 February 2010
GRACE JONES ACCUSED OF BEATING UP YOUNG BERG
Police have apprehended an erratic Grace Jones after she walked into her local Mcdonalds confessing to the assault of arti- rapp- musici- oh what the fuck- pussy hole Young Berg.
Ms. Jones who is now being questioned by police is said to have walked into her local Mcdonalds and when she discovered that they had run out of Big Macs told the server, "serve me da Mac or I'll fuck up your shit like your mother just re-christened you Young Berg."
The server then immediately called the police and whilst Miss Jones sat at the table waiting for police to arrive she told the manager everything.
"I walk into house- fuck up the security cameras with the heel of my boots and walk up to his motherfucking room- he say he no like dark skinned women- well last night he definitely saw how dark my pussy was when i stood over his face and made him drink my salty liquer, then i beat him around the head with my loaded weapon shoutin "you don't like what?!" "you dont like what?!"- his ass never saw it coming."
Berg, who is said to be sucking on the dick of his manager to calm himself down after the situation had this to say:
I tried to conversate widd her, leddaknow dat we could work shit out, but then she pissed on me man, she straight pissed me.
Other celebrities had this to say.
"Haha I say Haha- now I'll get back to pruning Que's ass"- Diddy.
"Ah man- that shit is so so fucked up- I wanted to be the first one to piss on Berg"- Ray J.
"Yes- it sad that this has happened and a testament that racism still exists- had it been Justin Bieber his attacker would have been curteous enough to shit on him but because Young Berg is a BLACK man, he was pissed on to symbolise the act of ownership"- Al Sharpton
"Erm- yeah its fucked up but thats life- when a bitch pisses on you you hop right back up, when a nigger shits on your gums and calls you Sandra Rose you hop right back up and when a nigger drops yo ass for some skinny ass bitch from Barbados who spends the money set aside for yo' nex record on vibrating tampons you hop right back up"- Foxy Brown
The Police also believe that Ms Jones had an accomplice and and urge anyone with any information to come forward.
Ms. Jones who is now being questioned by police is said to have walked into her local Mcdonalds and when she discovered that they had run out of Big Macs told the server, "serve me da Mac or I'll fuck up your shit like your mother just re-christened you Young Berg."
The server then immediately called the police and whilst Miss Jones sat at the table waiting for police to arrive she told the manager everything.
"I walk into house- fuck up the security cameras with the heel of my boots and walk up to his motherfucking room- he say he no like dark skinned women- well last night he definitely saw how dark my pussy was when i stood over his face and made him drink my salty liquer, then i beat him around the head with my loaded weapon shoutin "you don't like what?!" "you dont like what?!"- his ass never saw it coming."
Berg, who is said to be sucking on the dick of his manager to calm himself down after the situation had this to say:
I tried to conversate widd her, leddaknow dat we could work shit out, but then she pissed on me man, she straight pissed me.
Other celebrities had this to say.
"Haha I say Haha- now I'll get back to pruning Que's ass"- Diddy.
"Ah man- that shit is so so fucked up- I wanted to be the first one to piss on Berg"- Ray J.
"Yes- it sad that this has happened and a testament that racism still exists- had it been Justin Bieber his attacker would have been curteous enough to shit on him but because Young Berg is a BLACK man, he was pissed on to symbolise the act of ownership"- Al Sharpton
"Erm- yeah its fucked up but thats life- when a bitch pisses on you you hop right back up, when a nigger shits on your gums and calls you Sandra Rose you hop right back up and when a nigger drops yo ass for some skinny ass bitch from Barbados who spends the money set aside for yo' nex record on vibrating tampons you hop right back up"- Foxy Brown
The Police also believe that Ms Jones had an accomplice and and urge anyone with any information to come forward.
Tuesday, 2 February 2010
Lemon Pie.
Person A and Person B enter a pie making competition.
Person A and Person B along with five others enter the Fruit Pie category. Person A wins the award for having the Best Pie Overall, Person B wins for having the Best Fruit Pie. That's all im going to say about the VMAs and Grammys.
Onto a more shadier scenario- I logged onto my favourite site http://www.bossip.com/ and saw something which would have Moi Renee vogueing in her grave. Ray "I was irrelevant in the 90s and even more so almost 20 years later" J and The Game have put out a new track which has lines which get at Miss. Kim Kardashian.
Now we've spoken about hoe shit before as well as irrelevant shit but this shit that I'm about to go into is so sick and filthy that not even Tila Tequila would consider letting it penetrate her.
It's clear to me that Ray J and The Game are indeed the perfect match.
Dumb and Dumberer.
One looks like Rasputia sleeps on his face and the other couldn't sell white pussy to Tiger Woods.
You see- in my "insert modest but untruthful figure" years of living- I have learnt many valuable lessons- how to lace a bitches Soco with laxative- how to suck dick without gagging and how to dishearten a Mariah Carey fan but the most important lesson I have learnt is this:
People who ain't got shit to do always got shit to say.
Get into this my little sluts.
People who ain't got shit to do always got shit to say.
Shit like "Why does anybody need to stay in school- after you learn to count that's all you need." and shit like "I'm not benefiting from this sextape like she is- you don't see me on the cover of Playboy."
You see- this morning when Kim Kardashian woke up I'm sure the last thing on her mind was how she was going to pay her rent or how unsuccesful that guy she fucked on camera is, thats because Kim has shit to do.
When God gave Kim lemons, she made lemonade, lemon pie, lemon meringue, lemon tea and she served it all us to us and made us eat it. Don't hate on a bitch for making the best of a bad situation.
When was the last time your ass and head game turned you into an international brand?
When?
What honey?
Sweetie speak up- what did you say?
Never? Did you say not never?
Indeed bitch- never, and it never will because you're not smart like Kim.
You ain't know how to maximise yo' shit.
So Ray J, if your past work is anything to by- the highest this "song" you put out will go is number 8 on the Douglas/Harris Chart, so here's what I want you to do:
Tonight when you go to bed, sit up and think of all the things you achieved this week, not this year, not this decade, but this week. When you can list five things that your label (snickers) would be proud of that's when you can consider talking about succesful people.
And as for The Game- my dear- perhaps if you had stayed in school longer you would have been smart enough to realize not to sign that shady ass contract with Senor Curtis who still makes that cheddar everytime someone purchases one of your albums, comprende' fool?
Don't hate on Kim for doing the shit your ass is too stupid to think up.
Yes Ray J- your dick game is good- I've seen the tape and so yes- you could get your pole polished but it's a shame your career and mark in the world isn't as sweet and poweful as your cock.
It was the Grammys two nights ago- where were you?
The VMAs in 2009- where were you?
Keri Hilson collecting Employee Of the Day Award- where you?
Focus on the scent of your own shit before you try to come for somebody whose already flushed, scrubbed and disinfected their toilet bowl.
Fucker.
And oh yes- Young Buck called- he wants to know if he left his lube at your place?
Monday, 18 January 2010
The Devil Made Me Do it- Celebrities and the Illuminati
For as long as I can remember, music has been the devil.
In the choir, when I decided to use the ad lib that Beyonce' did at the end of Bootylicious in my solo, I was called the devil.
When I told my mother I was going to see Milli Vanilli on their Out of Synch Tour, I was called the devil and when my dad walked in on me dry humping my Sade poster, she was called the devil.
And recently, the devil has been doing all sorts of twists, twirls and turns on the lips of everyone who knows how to type http://www.youtube.com/ into their web bar. Some pretty intelligent people have used and are using youtube to expose the devil imagery that exists in the demonic videos of stars like Beyonce' and the like. These intelligent people have seen the light and have seen these devil worshipping stars for what they really are, part of a secret devil worshipping society that uses their music to glorify Satan himself (clutches pearls)
These devil worshippers thought that nobody would clock their tea, they thought they could lace our drinks with laxatives and think we wouldnt shit, they thought they could give us quasedillas when we clearly asked for lasagne (how u durin Qaadir?). They thought NOBODY would find out about their secret.
YOU WILL BUY FANTASY RIDE
YOU WILL BUY FANTASY RIDE
YOU WILL BUY FANTASY RIDE
YOU WILL BUY FANTASY RIDE
Secret.
Secret.
Secret.
Well homie thats a- that's a funny word- what did you say? secret? Did you say secret society nigger?
Just a thought- if this society is so secret how do you know about it?
I mean- if this society is bumping vaginas with the devil I'm sure their asses can keep a secret?
If this society is knocking boots with evil you don't think they'd be a little more subtle.?
Isn't it strange how only urban artists are being accused of being part of this society?
All burning questions, so I'm going to clock this tea and for those of you who take your tea sweet, sugary and creamy you can take your asses over to MediaTakeOut, we don't hold our tongues here.
The reason it is Beyonce' and not RHCP being accused of being devil worshippers is because the people who accuse Beyonce' of giving her spice rack up to Lucifer don't know who the RHCP's are. You see- it's difficult to accuse someone of something if you know very little about that person but very easy to accuse someone of something when you have ample reference points.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWmiec1031o
The reason you never hear Alicia "Cum Guzzling Husband Snatching Dick Riding Nut Sucking Piano Playing Acne Ridden" Keys being called a she-devil is because her music videos have very few concepts which leaves little room for re-intepretation.
Alicia walks to Piano. Alicia plays Piano. Alicia Sings Into Mic. Alicia Nods. Alicia Gets Up. Alicia Leaves.
But when you're Rihanna and your ass really wants to impress your fans with your videos (say what you want about Ms.Fenty- but her videos aint never lied) you are going to provide a series of big concepts, imagery and cultural referencing which people can easily interpret to fit their own mind set.
What has happened is that artists of today have become so lazy that fans are suprised when an artist actually puts effort and time into concepts people think there's always another motive.
"Lady Gaga just a fake ass attention seeker."
"Rihanna just has big budget videos cos if she didnt we'd be forced to pay attention to her voice"- (this is actually true.)
"Fuck a Sasha Fierce- Beyonce' is possessed by none other than the demon Beyeezecreole"
And when you a rapper and you reference something that ig'nant people have never heard of before, the same shit may occur.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_Margiela
"Uh Uh ain't nobody fresher
I'm in Maison- uh Martin Margiela"
Maybe if Mr.Camel had said "Im in Baby Phat- but Rocawear is better" perhaps you would have understood. Mr. Camel being the crazy old fox he is decided to say the word "Maison" because he knew how wet you'd get up in the pup.
Gandreanataquaelonah: he said Mason! As in Free Mason! I told y'all!
Gynaceoloistivagistana-(isha): Gurr- thats the last time I listen to his ass again- from now I'm sticking to Michael Jackson- he ain't never did nuthin wrong.
Maison means house in French, I'm sure Celestine taught Jigga that word.
Maison is spelt M.A.I.S.O.N.
I don't blame you for being ignorant- you were too busy analyzing the suspicious circumstances surrounding Beyonce's lacefront wig to pay attention in class.
You see, if these people were in the business of working the devil to manipulate our minds you don't think they'd find a better way of doing it. You don't think they'd find a way of doing it without us noticing. It's strange that when people accuse a certain deceased pervert of being paedophile everyone wants to catch feelings EVEN THOUGH he was accused twice and he admitted that "there's nothing wrong with sleeping with boys" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_h1euQKJsr4 but when people decide one day that a few black artists who are actually achieving shit all take vacations in the underworld everyone believes it without questioning it.
Maybe it's the black communities seemingly suicidal contempt for anything black and succesful which is the cause for this bullshit, after all I haven't heard anybody accusing Keri Hilson or Ciara of that shit.
I am sure that devil worshipping within the music industry does exist as it does all around the world but just because you don't like an artist doesn't mean they're riding on Lucifer's dick.
For those of you who now think that I am a devil worshipper and have been paid (in 100 dollar bills) by someone to post this post as a way to make the rumours look like a big ole piece of monkeydoodle foolishness, then please feel free to hitch up your tetas and drop me an email.
And for those of you who are running out of Beyonce' videos to annotate, darken and tint with red ,please accept this humble gift:
YOU WILL BUY MS.KELLY THE FORGOTTEN MEMBER DELUXE EDITION.
YOU WILL BUY MS. KELLY THE FORGOTTEN MEMBER DELUXE EDITION- EUROPEAN MIX.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EiwWGtArjw
MATHEW KNOWLES IS KING.
MATHEW KNOWLES IS KING.
MATHEW KNOWLES IS KING
Sunday, 17 January 2010
KERI WILSON INTERVIEW.
Now you hoes know my hustle. You know that I was raised according the Joe Jackson way, abuse now- manipulate later. So you know that I had to fuck the security guard at Walmart, suck the managers dick and let the cashier cum in my ear just to get this interview with Ms.Keri Wilson.
Ms.Wilson and I met up at her swanky pad (the apartement on top of her local Wendy's) to discuss life, love and lubrication.
1. What is the name of your debut album?
Ms Wilson: I AM KERI HILSON..... THE FAME MONSTER IN A PERFECT WORLD. Located at your local drug dealer or dollar store. It's going to change the world just like my sisters Mushroom Cut.
2. If your vagina had a nickname, what wouldn't it be and why not?
Ms.Wilson: Sweet Moist and Juicy..... cos its not point blank.
3. When was the last time you saw your sister, Keril Hilson?
Ms.Wilson: Last week at Target during her day shift. (Sips champagne)
4. When was the last time you were involved in a drive by?
Ms.Wilson: Not since the Tupac shooting.
5. What is your album release date- all of 6 of them.
Ms.Wilson: Well I have one album out that was released on December 12th 2009. Hopefully my label "Wiggy Inc" won't do an Ashanti on me and drop me so i can make 6 more albums.
6. Your sister is hated by Sasha Supremacists, what is your view of Creolentricity?
Ms.Wilson: (sighs) Well I have no clue why they hate my sister, I mean BET which is like the best network ever crowned her a "Rising Icon", so she could get some kind of respect. Stop tweeting her shit like "You dance like Elvis on a pound of crack" or "You're only famous because you sucked Weezy, Neyo, and Kanye's dick to get on your wack azz track" JUST FUCKIN STOP IT (flips wig and leaves interview.)
Ms.Wilson and I met up at her swanky pad (the apartement on top of her local Wendy's) to discuss life, love and lubrication.
1. What is the name of your debut album?
Ms Wilson: I AM KERI HILSON..... THE FAME MONSTER IN A PERFECT WORLD. Located at your local drug dealer or dollar store. It's going to change the world just like my sisters Mushroom Cut.
2. If your vagina had a nickname, what wouldn't it be and why not?
Ms.Wilson: Sweet Moist and Juicy..... cos its not point blank.
3. When was the last time you saw your sister, Keril Hilson?
Ms.Wilson: Last week at Target during her day shift. (Sips champagne)
4. When was the last time you were involved in a drive by?
Ms.Wilson: Not since the Tupac shooting.
5. What is your album release date- all of 6 of them.
Ms.Wilson: Well I have one album out that was released on December 12th 2009. Hopefully my label "Wiggy Inc" won't do an Ashanti on me and drop me so i can make 6 more albums.
6. Your sister is hated by Sasha Supremacists, what is your view of Creolentricity?
Ms.Wilson: (sighs) Well I have no clue why they hate my sister, I mean BET which is like the best network ever crowned her a "Rising Icon", so she could get some kind of respect. Stop tweeting her shit like "You dance like Elvis on a pound of crack" or "You're only famous because you sucked Weezy, Neyo, and Kanye's dick to get on your wack azz track" JUST FUCKIN STOP IT (flips wig and leaves interview.)
Saturday, 16 January 2010
The League of Unextraordinary R'n'b Skeezes
Janet: All rise!
Jennifer Hudson: Did you say rice?
Janet: I'd like to thank everyone forcoming to this meeting tonight- I know there was heavy snow.
Mary J.Blige : Yes- what is this about Janet- because if this is about those quesadillas that went missing- it wasn't me.
Janet: No no silly- this is about something more serious, we have to introduce two new members to our secret society tonight, they're on their way, before they comeis there anything anyone would like to discuss.
Mya: Yes- there is something.
Janet: What is it?
Mya: Why is it that I was even invited to this meeting?, I dance on one of the country's most popular shows- I am no longer unextraordinary and how would you know that I'm R'n'b when people are too busy laughing at my music to even listen to it. (Ciara turns to Janet)
Janet: (sigh) Mya- just because your shit is covered in gold doesnt change the fact that its shit- Dancing With The Stars was MADE for unextraordinary R'n'b skeezes like us- you think white folk are going to care about you just because they applaud when you shake your little pancake ass around some shiny ass stage. Whitefolk are too busy wondering how Tyra Banks hair grows so fast to care about some short latin bitch who couldnt sell explosives to an Arab. Anybody else got something they need to gets off their chest?
Mary J: You don't think we should be discussing the tragedy that just occured?
Ciara: But my new album isn't even out yet?
Janet: She's talking about Haiti.
Mary J: You don't think we can take advantage of it?
Ciara: How you mean?
Mary J: What if we went to Haiti and set up our own show there- the people would pay us to perform.
Ashanti: Now why would they do that- their lives have been ruined.
Mary J: They'll pay because we'll convince them that we are the Beyonce's of the Western World, they've been too busy sacrificing they children to know any different. If we penetrate poor markets we could slowly dominate them.
Ciara: Still not following you.
MaryJ: Why is that Creole whore so succesful, because her entire career is based on raw capitalism- survival of the fittest and what's the opposite of capitalism- it's communism which accepts anything mediocore (they all look around and nod) if we do to poor communist nations like that bitch did to wealthy capitalist nations we'll be back in business.
Ashanti: You a genius-but didn't Kelly already try that.
Mary J: Shut the fuck up Sheqoiya- Kelly didn't try shit.
Janet: I like your plan Mary- but none of us speak communist. (Mary sighs.- there is a knock on the door.)
Ciara: Nobody's home!
Janet: Who is it? Yell out the secret code.
Michelle Williams: BET SPECIAL.
Janet: Come in. (Michelle enters, Ashanti rolls eyes, Ciara kisses her teeth, Jennifer Hudson eats cake) Please welcome our latest member, Michelle.
Mary: Well well well how unexpected.
Michelle: Hello to you too Mary- I've left Mathew. (They all cheer.)
Mya: How did you finally come to that decision?
Michelle: I was going to leave when Farrah left but Solange had pictures of me that I'd rather not get out so I stayed but the final straw for me was the BET Awards- what was SUPPOSED to be our final performance, Beyonce' got to grind on the sexy ass guy, Kelly got to grind on Nelly (Ashanti grunts) but I had to grind on the guy with HIV.
Janet: Sorry to cut you Michelle but didnt you say you were bringing Kelly.
Michelle: She's in Europe: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qH5D_0BaWbc
Ciara: Well girl- I hope you didn't think the grass would be greener away from Mathew- he isn't the cause of your problems- if he was then we'd all be managed by him too.
Michelle: Sorry?
Ciara: It's in MusicWorld's interests to have as many succesful artists as possible so that they earn a higher percentage out of everything that their artists are paid for. Mathew WISHES you endorsed L'oreal, Pepsi, Tommy Hilfiger and all that jazz then he'd make money from ALL of you, Mathew WISHES he didnt have to come up with excuses for your flop records everytime Columbia wanted answers.
Janet: What are you saying?
Ciara: I'm saying that it's time we took control of our own careers instead of blaming everyone and they mama for our own shit- I mean just look at Letoya- her album release date was pushed back 6 years yet her shit is still on point. I think it's time I left this secret society and started working on a record that people will listen to without thinking of tearing out their eardrums.
Janet:Thengoonwitchobadseyelf but dont come running back when your label drops to sign some new bitch who looks like she only finished breastfeeding an hour ago.
Ciara: I will. (Ciara rises and proceeds to leave) I'll stop by tommorow to pick up the rest of my shit. (Ciara leaves.)
Janet: Anyone else wanna follow her? (nothing is said) I was going to wait till the end of the meeting for this- but i might as well do it now. The league of unextraordinary skeezes has a new anthem which embodies are thirst for all things unsuccesful, here are the lyrics, love them, learn them, live them:
Jennifer Hudson: Did you say rice?
Janet: I'd like to thank everyone forcoming to this meeting tonight- I know there was heavy snow.
Mary J.Blige : Yes- what is this about Janet- because if this is about those quesadillas that went missing- it wasn't me.
Janet: No no silly- this is about something more serious, we have to introduce two new members to our secret society tonight, they're on their way, before they comeis there anything anyone would like to discuss.
Mya: Yes- there is something.
Janet: What is it?
Mya: Why is it that I was even invited to this meeting?, I dance on one of the country's most popular shows- I am no longer unextraordinary and how would you know that I'm R'n'b when people are too busy laughing at my music to even listen to it. (Ciara turns to Janet)
Janet: (sigh) Mya- just because your shit is covered in gold doesnt change the fact that its shit- Dancing With The Stars was MADE for unextraordinary R'n'b skeezes like us- you think white folk are going to care about you just because they applaud when you shake your little pancake ass around some shiny ass stage. Whitefolk are too busy wondering how Tyra Banks hair grows so fast to care about some short latin bitch who couldnt sell explosives to an Arab. Anybody else got something they need to gets off their chest?
Mary J: You don't think we should be discussing the tragedy that just occured?
Ciara: But my new album isn't even out yet?
Janet: She's talking about Haiti.
Mary J: You don't think we can take advantage of it?
Ciara: How you mean?
Mary J: What if we went to Haiti and set up our own show there- the people would pay us to perform.
Ashanti: Now why would they do that- their lives have been ruined.
Mary J: They'll pay because we'll convince them that we are the Beyonce's of the Western World, they've been too busy sacrificing they children to know any different. If we penetrate poor markets we could slowly dominate them.
Ciara: Still not following you.
MaryJ: Why is that Creole whore so succesful, because her entire career is based on raw capitalism- survival of the fittest and what's the opposite of capitalism- it's communism which accepts anything mediocore (they all look around and nod) if we do to poor communist nations like that bitch did to wealthy capitalist nations we'll be back in business.
Ashanti: You a genius-but didn't Kelly already try that.
Mary J: Shut the fuck up Sheqoiya- Kelly didn't try shit.
Janet: I like your plan Mary- but none of us speak communist. (Mary sighs.- there is a knock on the door.)
Ciara: Nobody's home!
Janet: Who is it? Yell out the secret code.
Michelle Williams: BET SPECIAL.
Janet: Come in. (Michelle enters, Ashanti rolls eyes, Ciara kisses her teeth, Jennifer Hudson eats cake) Please welcome our latest member, Michelle.
Mary: Well well well how unexpected.
Michelle: Hello to you too Mary- I've left Mathew. (They all cheer.)
Mya: How did you finally come to that decision?
Michelle: I was going to leave when Farrah left but Solange had pictures of me that I'd rather not get out so I stayed but the final straw for me was the BET Awards- what was SUPPOSED to be our final performance, Beyonce' got to grind on the sexy ass guy, Kelly got to grind on Nelly (Ashanti grunts) but I had to grind on the guy with HIV.
Janet: Sorry to cut you Michelle but didnt you say you were bringing Kelly.
Michelle: She's in Europe: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qH5D_0BaWbc
Ciara: Well girl- I hope you didn't think the grass would be greener away from Mathew- he isn't the cause of your problems- if he was then we'd all be managed by him too.
Michelle: Sorry?
Ciara: It's in MusicWorld's interests to have as many succesful artists as possible so that they earn a higher percentage out of everything that their artists are paid for. Mathew WISHES you endorsed L'oreal, Pepsi, Tommy Hilfiger and all that jazz then he'd make money from ALL of you, Mathew WISHES he didnt have to come up with excuses for your flop records everytime Columbia wanted answers.
Janet: What are you saying?
Ciara: I'm saying that it's time we took control of our own careers instead of blaming everyone and they mama for our own shit- I mean just look at Letoya- her album release date was pushed back 6 years yet her shit is still on point. I think it's time I left this secret society and started working on a record that people will listen to without thinking of tearing out their eardrums.
Janet:Thengoonwitchobadseyelf but dont come running back when your label drops to sign some new bitch who looks like she only finished breastfeeding an hour ago.
Ciara: I will. (Ciara rises and proceeds to leave) I'll stop by tommorow to pick up the rest of my shit. (Ciara leaves.)
Janet: Anyone else wanna follow her? (nothing is said) I was going to wait till the end of the meeting for this- but i might as well do it now. The league of unextraordinary skeezes has a new anthem which embodies are thirst for all things unsuccesful, here are the lyrics, love them, learn them, live them:
I know you want the licky licky
Tell me you want the licky licky
You can't deny the licky licky
I know just what you like.
Saturday, 9 January 2010
Did you really want to know where the blog girls were at?
Hello motherfuckers, c'est moi.
I know it's been a minute, but I was kidnapped by every single one of Ciara's fan and they forced me to engage in a foursome so after MediaTakeOut paid my ransom fee in exchange for some interesting stories I have spent the Christmas and New Year recovering in a place I like to call home (Youtube.)
Now for me Youtube is a very powerful tool for the publicists of hasbeen Havanah's like Ashanti who post comments like "Top that Beyaki!" in the comment board underneath the video of Ashanti performing Aww Baby at her fat sister's house party(no such video exists- Ashanti's sister's fingers were too fat to press record.)
Youtube also allows us to hear an entire album without buying it and so since I don't like wasting my money,I decided to listen to Rated R.
To begin with, I forced myself to like the record in fear of being labelled a "hating ass Sasha Supremacist" and then just as I was about to steal $10 from my Grandmother's purse to go and buy it, a Rihanna interview came on and reality set in. The album is only good when you forget that Rihanna is singing/neighing it.
In Rihanna's interview she tried her best to present herself as an artist who had taken a risk with this record, an artist who had a deep connection with the lyrics and greater understanding of what Rated R meant for her. Yet what Rihanna forgot was that we know none of the concepts on the record were created by her and that we all know she's too stupid to actually understand why her writers have written an album like this for her.
Since 2007, Rihanna has been on a mission to prove to the world that she's a "tough ass chick" sort of like a high fashion Pink and with Good Girl Gone Bad's intensly catchy singles even if you weren't convinced by Rihanna's contrived imageyou couldn't help but love the songs.On this record, her writers and producers have tried to create an album to be the soundtrack to Rihanna's image.
The only problem is that Rihanna is not a convincing artist and even intellectual well written songs like Cold Case Love do nothing to move the spirit. On G4L Rihanna tries her best to sound as though she is a gully bitch, like she has a razor in her purse and a rifle in her cooch. The only problem with that is that we know Rihanna isn't a bad bitch, not because she got beat up but because of the way she handled getting beat up. Waiting only to discuss the "incident" with Diane Sawyer when Rated R was coming out to use the publicity surrounding the interview to promote an album which refused to give her a number 1 single. Think about it, how many artists do you stan for talk with Diane Sawyer to promote their record- Rihanna was not concerned with telling her story but more concerned with trying to make us believe that she was an honest, truthful "don't give a fuck" type of girl.
In the song Hard, Rihanna calls hating ass bitches like me out not realizing that it's hating ass bitches like me that spent more time promoting her record than her label could afford to. Rihanna- being the immature whore that she is still has not recognized the last year MediaTake Out was her biggest form of promotion and that BlogGirls like me have a big influence on the way people perceive what artists do. Why do you think Michelle Williams panders to the Skorpion Show or Mariah Carey suddenly has an interest in BScott, they are protecting themselves against being called out by developing personal relationships with the influence leaders like Youtubers and bloggers.
Calling out blogs for discussing the shit that YOUR publicists put out is stupid and ignorant and proof of how even after millions are spent on promotion, packaging and preparing an artist, if the product itself is stupid people won't buy it and with three radio singles, not 1 number 1 and a record that slid down the charts quicker than a fingerless chimpanzee trying to climb a stripper pole that is exactly the case with Rated R.
Rihanna- your tea has been clocked.
I know it's been a minute, but I was kidnapped by every single one of Ciara's fan and they forced me to engage in a foursome so after MediaTakeOut paid my ransom fee in exchange for some interesting stories I have spent the Christmas and New Year recovering in a place I like to call home (Youtube.)
Now for me Youtube is a very powerful tool for the publicists of hasbeen Havanah's like Ashanti who post comments like "Top that Beyaki!" in the comment board underneath the video of Ashanti performing Aww Baby at her fat sister's house party(no such video exists- Ashanti's sister's fingers were too fat to press record.)
Youtube also allows us to hear an entire album without buying it and so since I don't like wasting my money,I decided to listen to Rated R.
To begin with, I forced myself to like the record in fear of being labelled a "hating ass Sasha Supremacist" and then just as I was about to steal $10 from my Grandmother's purse to go and buy it, a Rihanna interview came on and reality set in. The album is only good when you forget that Rihanna is singing/neighing it.
In Rihanna's interview she tried her best to present herself as an artist who had taken a risk with this record, an artist who had a deep connection with the lyrics and greater understanding of what Rated R meant for her. Yet what Rihanna forgot was that we know none of the concepts on the record were created by her and that we all know she's too stupid to actually understand why her writers have written an album like this for her.
Since 2007, Rihanna has been on a mission to prove to the world that she's a "tough ass chick" sort of like a high fashion Pink and with Good Girl Gone Bad's intensly catchy singles even if you weren't convinced by Rihanna's contrived imageyou couldn't help but love the songs.On this record, her writers and producers have tried to create an album to be the soundtrack to Rihanna's image.
The only problem is that Rihanna is not a convincing artist and even intellectual well written songs like Cold Case Love do nothing to move the spirit. On G4L Rihanna tries her best to sound as though she is a gully bitch, like she has a razor in her purse and a rifle in her cooch. The only problem with that is that we know Rihanna isn't a bad bitch, not because she got beat up but because of the way she handled getting beat up. Waiting only to discuss the "incident" with Diane Sawyer when Rated R was coming out to use the publicity surrounding the interview to promote an album which refused to give her a number 1 single. Think about it, how many artists do you stan for talk with Diane Sawyer to promote their record- Rihanna was not concerned with telling her story but more concerned with trying to make us believe that she was an honest, truthful "don't give a fuck" type of girl.
In the song Hard, Rihanna calls hating ass bitches like me out not realizing that it's hating ass bitches like me that spent more time promoting her record than her label could afford to. Rihanna- being the immature whore that she is still has not recognized the last year MediaTake Out was her biggest form of promotion and that BlogGirls like me have a big influence on the way people perceive what artists do. Why do you think Michelle Williams panders to the Skorpion Show or Mariah Carey suddenly has an interest in BScott, they are protecting themselves against being called out by developing personal relationships with the influence leaders like Youtubers and bloggers.
Calling out blogs for discussing the shit that YOUR publicists put out is stupid and ignorant and proof of how even after millions are spent on promotion, packaging and preparing an artist, if the product itself is stupid people won't buy it and with three radio singles, not 1 number 1 and a record that slid down the charts quicker than a fingerless chimpanzee trying to climb a stripper pole that is exactly the case with Rated R.
Rihanna- your tea has been clocked.
Monday, 14 December 2009
I take my coffee black- like my men
Sometimes when I'm alone in my apartement I find myself having debates with myself. The other night myself and I debated whether people with multiple personalities should be sectioned and institutionalised and myself and I resolved the debate by simply putting on 106 and Park and watching Terrence and Rocsi pretend to like the shit they interview. Then I saw Nicki Minaj.
Now I tried for some time to avoid the hype surrounding her and then I realized something- people like me are always dogging on people like Ciara and Kelly Rowland for not being good enough or not trying hard enough to "put their name" out there and so it was hypcrotical for me NOT to give this Minaj character a look and a listen.
So I Youtubed her and watched a couple of interviews and came to a conclusion which my dear friends at the WigCrypt had come to many years ago.
In this world if YOU want something YOU need to get up and GO get IT.
I realized whilst studying Minaj that this bitch has DEFINED WHO SHE IS. I'm sure there are 100s of bitches on Twitter who can spit harder than Alicia after sucking the tip of that married man's love pistol but there's a reason it's Nicky Minaj whose on everyone's lips. When I began to understand her purpose,I understood how phenomenal she actually is. Here is a black girl from Brooklyn referencing Japanese street fashion and forcing a culture which is ignorant to anything which doesn't sag low to pay attention.
THAT's how you get people's attention.
You dont say "Im not getting anywhere cos im dark skin" or "if i was slimmer i'd be where Beyonce' is," get up and do something about it. If you want to prove that dark skin is just as beautiful as light skin then you need to come up with a gimmic to exploit that. Too many people use stereotypes when it suits them and get mad when stereotypes do not work to their advantage.
"Black Girls have bigger butts than girls from all other races." Correct.
"Black Girls are rude, obnoxious and hate on white girls." FUCK YOU MEAN.
If you allow yourself to be grouped into stereotypical segmentations, do not be suprised when those stereotypes work to your disadvantage.
"Are you sure you want to hire the black girl- she looked pretty rude."
"Are you sure you want to give the blonde the mangerial positition- she probably sucked, fucked and timmytucked her way to this company- let the man have it."
The reason I am doing this post is because I have a lot of debates regarding the media's unfair portrayal of black women in society.
It seems to me that what black means to the Media isn't what black means to black people. As much as I love the variations that black people have, European Creole, African, African American, Coolie it seems to me that the only representation that is perceived to be beautiful is this one:
http://static.gossipgirlinsider.com/images/gallery/tyra-banks.jpg
Tyra Banks isn't any less blacker because her "hair" is fair and her eyes are green but what's a chocolate skinned mami to do when she feels that her beauty will never be respected. What's she to do when the world won't call her beautiful like they do to her fairer counterparts.
Stop wanting to be called beautiful.
Stop expecting your beauty to be respected.
Acknowledge on your beauty, acknowledge your own skin color and acknowledge your own hair type because this is the body God gave you and it's the body you are going to die with. You can put plastic in your nose but itll biodegrade in the grave and you can put relaxer in your but that won't make it rain-proof.
Bitches who acknowledge their beauty get further because they know that looks can only get you so far.
For example:
http://iwantmysexyback.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/ciara1.jpg
http://popdynamite.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/lady-gaga-ugly.jpg
If being conventionally beautiful was the answer to everything then Princess Super C wouldn't be handing in her resumee at Sears right now. It's the weird looking bitch whose an icon one year after debutin and it's the weird looking bitch that everyone respects because that weird looking bitch knows what she's about and defined her own beauty instead of depending on Janet Jackson and Aaliyah to do it for her.
That's why I officially fucks with this Minaj character- instead of doing what Lil Kim and Foxxy did, she is going to do with what Nicki Minaj needs to do to make sure she's the one that we're all talking about and respect. That's how you get your name out there- it's how you promote yourself and it's how you make sure that even after 12 years of being signed people don't have a reason to respect anything you've done in your OWN right:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoJSnuyrj8w&feature=video_response
Now I tried for some time to avoid the hype surrounding her and then I realized something- people like me are always dogging on people like Ciara and Kelly Rowland for not being good enough or not trying hard enough to "put their name" out there and so it was hypcrotical for me NOT to give this Minaj character a look and a listen.
So I Youtubed her and watched a couple of interviews and came to a conclusion which my dear friends at the WigCrypt had come to many years ago.
In this world if YOU want something YOU need to get up and GO get IT.
I realized whilst studying Minaj that this bitch has DEFINED WHO SHE IS. I'm sure there are 100s of bitches on Twitter who can spit harder than Alicia after sucking the tip of that married man's love pistol but there's a reason it's Nicky Minaj whose on everyone's lips. When I began to understand her purpose,I understood how phenomenal she actually is. Here is a black girl from Brooklyn referencing Japanese street fashion and forcing a culture which is ignorant to anything which doesn't sag low to pay attention.
THAT's how you get people's attention.
You dont say "Im not getting anywhere cos im dark skin" or "if i was slimmer i'd be where Beyonce' is," get up and do something about it. If you want to prove that dark skin is just as beautiful as light skin then you need to come up with a gimmic to exploit that. Too many people use stereotypes when it suits them and get mad when stereotypes do not work to their advantage.
"Black Girls have bigger butts than girls from all other races." Correct.
"Black Girls are rude, obnoxious and hate on white girls." FUCK YOU MEAN.
If you allow yourself to be grouped into stereotypical segmentations, do not be suprised when those stereotypes work to your disadvantage.
"Are you sure you want to hire the black girl- she looked pretty rude."
"Are you sure you want to give the blonde the mangerial positition- she probably sucked, fucked and timmytucked her way to this company- let the man have it."
The reason I am doing this post is because I have a lot of debates regarding the media's unfair portrayal of black women in society.
It seems to me that what black means to the Media isn't what black means to black people. As much as I love the variations that black people have, European Creole, African, African American, Coolie it seems to me that the only representation that is perceived to be beautiful is this one:
http://static.gossipgirlinsider.com/images/gallery/tyra-banks.jpg
Tyra Banks isn't any less blacker because her "hair" is fair and her eyes are green but what's a chocolate skinned mami to do when she feels that her beauty will never be respected. What's she to do when the world won't call her beautiful like they do to her fairer counterparts.
Stop wanting to be called beautiful.
Stop expecting your beauty to be respected.
Acknowledge on your beauty, acknowledge your own skin color and acknowledge your own hair type because this is the body God gave you and it's the body you are going to die with. You can put plastic in your nose but itll biodegrade in the grave and you can put relaxer in your but that won't make it rain-proof.
Bitches who acknowledge their beauty get further because they know that looks can only get you so far.
For example:
http://iwantmysexyback.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/ciara1.jpg
http://popdynamite.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/lady-gaga-ugly.jpg
If being conventionally beautiful was the answer to everything then Princess Super C wouldn't be handing in her resumee at Sears right now. It's the weird looking bitch whose an icon one year after debutin and it's the weird looking bitch that everyone respects because that weird looking bitch knows what she's about and defined her own beauty instead of depending on Janet Jackson and Aaliyah to do it for her.
That's why I officially fucks with this Minaj character- instead of doing what Lil Kim and Foxxy did, she is going to do with what Nicki Minaj needs to do to make sure she's the one that we're all talking about and respect. That's how you get your name out there- it's how you promote yourself and it's how you make sure that even after 12 years of being signed people don't have a reason to respect anything you've done in your OWN right:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoJSnuyrj8w&feature=video_response
Monday, 7 December 2009
Grrrr Baby Grrrrr
Since my little vacation to an Island in the sun, I haven't had time to blog- yes call me whatchu want I have time to tweet but no time to blog, sue me.
However, this incident was making spirits do all kinds of dips, flips and samurai kicks when I heard about it.
To begin with I'd like to say that violence is not gender specific, a woman beating a man is just as bad as a man beating a woman, although the outcome will always be different its just as bad.
However.
When I heard that Tiger Wood's wife may have gone Glenn Close on his ass for dickdowning some other bitches I just had to applaud and called on the spirit of Pepper Labeija to send me a hiss so wicked that even Neyo would have to step back.
When someone gets married-that person dedicates their entire being and existance to that person, they dedicate their time to that person and share aspects of their soul with that person which may be very hard to.
So when that person betrays you by fucking ANOTHER woman and THEN comes home and eats YOUR cooking and then uses YOUR pussy after he's already had some OTHER pussy I believe this causes for some Celestininity.
Celestininity is the art of making a motherfucker pay for a wrong they have commited by making life as difficult as possible for them http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PmV_vsYgPI
Only when that person is truly sorry must the Celestiniasation of that person end. The art of Celestininity is not to get your ass in trouble whilst getting your revenge, this is why Tiger Woods wife isn't all that smart.
You see, when fucking with a rich dude you must learn that the only mouth that speaks is money- hit that motherfucker where it hurts- his account!
What that hoe should have done is told that cheating scoundrel "Looky here- you done cheated on me- you better find a way to cancel our prenuptial agreement OR I will take the kids and drag your name so low even Cassie will start sucking on it."
From Tiger Woods leaked calls to one of his side pieces it is evident that his pussy stinks more than Precious' on a summers day and so the idea of losing his wife and kids would scare him shitless. He would have no choice but to comply http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8doUht3SEM , fucking bastard.
What she shouldnt have done is beat his car with one of his own clubs because that's just rude. What she should have done is hit him with a baseball bat and say "You think I don't know how to play for the other team?".
And when it comes to those cum guzzling, scandalous ass, dick inhaling, anal friendly pussy leasing stretch marked mouthed harlots who want to fuck with a married man- you better thank your lucky stars that it wasn't a black woman who Tiger was married too. I hate racial stereotypes just as much as the next ex KKK member BUT we all know how black girls get down.
If this was a black woman, Shenaysha, Randaqua and Discombombalayniatiarnaqua would have driven by your house by now and shot bullets into your motherfucking window- that's right- they're ghetto and maybe that's what your dirty ass needs to teach you to close your legs to married men.
For those of you who have slept with married men or intend to- here's what I hope DOESN'T happen to you: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZdRN_QXvm4&feature=related
Fucking whores.
However, this incident was making spirits do all kinds of dips, flips and samurai kicks when I heard about it.
To begin with I'd like to say that violence is not gender specific, a woman beating a man is just as bad as a man beating a woman, although the outcome will always be different its just as bad.
However.
When I heard that Tiger Wood's wife may have gone Glenn Close on his ass for dickdowning some other bitches I just had to applaud and called on the spirit of Pepper Labeija to send me a hiss so wicked that even Neyo would have to step back.
When someone gets married-that person dedicates their entire being and existance to that person, they dedicate their time to that person and share aspects of their soul with that person which may be very hard to.
So when that person betrays you by fucking ANOTHER woman and THEN comes home and eats YOUR cooking and then uses YOUR pussy after he's already had some OTHER pussy I believe this causes for some Celestininity.
Celestininity is the art of making a motherfucker pay for a wrong they have commited by making life as difficult as possible for them http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PmV_vsYgPI
Only when that person is truly sorry must the Celestiniasation of that person end. The art of Celestininity is not to get your ass in trouble whilst getting your revenge, this is why Tiger Woods wife isn't all that smart.
You see, when fucking with a rich dude you must learn that the only mouth that speaks is money- hit that motherfucker where it hurts- his account!
What that hoe should have done is told that cheating scoundrel "Looky here- you done cheated on me- you better find a way to cancel our prenuptial agreement OR I will take the kids and drag your name so low even Cassie will start sucking on it."
From Tiger Woods leaked calls to one of his side pieces it is evident that his pussy stinks more than Precious' on a summers day and so the idea of losing his wife and kids would scare him shitless. He would have no choice but to comply http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8doUht3SEM , fucking bastard.
What she shouldnt have done is beat his car with one of his own clubs because that's just rude. What she should have done is hit him with a baseball bat and say "You think I don't know how to play for the other team?".
And when it comes to those cum guzzling, scandalous ass, dick inhaling, anal friendly pussy leasing stretch marked mouthed harlots who want to fuck with a married man- you better thank your lucky stars that it wasn't a black woman who Tiger was married too. I hate racial stereotypes just as much as the next ex KKK member BUT we all know how black girls get down.
If this was a black woman, Shenaysha, Randaqua and Discombombalayniatiarnaqua would have driven by your house by now and shot bullets into your motherfucking window- that's right- they're ghetto and maybe that's what your dirty ass needs to teach you to close your legs to married men.
For those of you who have slept with married men or intend to- here's what I hope DOESN'T happen to you: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZdRN_QXvm4&feature=related
Fucking whores.
Thursday, 5 November 2009
DEAR MTV
To Whom It May Concern
I am a peaceloving person, I give to charity, I put dollar bills in the collection box, I even let a homeless man eat me out when he told me hadn't had a meal in weeks. As a peaceloving person I believe that we as individuals should spread peace as easily as Alicia Keys spreads her legs.
Mtv- It's important you understand what your name is. Music. You are called Music Television, so like you are meant to be a channel which plays music.
So when two icons decide to put their creative brains together and create something amazing like let's say a music video, you would think that as a channel which calls itself Music Tv would play that video when they said they would.
It's not nice to cheat people, it's not nice to advertise falsely. How would you feel if someone promised you something for weeks and then decided not to give it to you. Huh?
YOUR ASSES BETTER HOPE I DON'T CATCH ONE OF YOUR FUCKING EMPLOYEES COS IF MY CRAZY BLACK ASS DOES I WILL CHARGE MY VIDEO PHONE IN THEIR FUCKING ANUSES YOU FUCKING LIARS. YOU FUCKIN MADE ME TAKE A DAY OFF WORK FOR THIS VIDEO JUST TO TELL ME YOUR FUCKIN ASSES ARE GOING TO AIR IT AT A LATER DATE.
YOU PUT ON THE HILLS ON TIME.
YOU GIVE DULL COUNTRY SINGERS AWARDS THEY DONT DESERVE.
YOU EVEN GIVE BRITNEY GOOD REVIEWS.
YET WHEN TWO ICONS DECIDE TO CREATE AN ICONIC MUSIC VIDEO YOU DECIDE TO TAUNT US AND MAKE US WATCH US SOME DUMASS DATING SHOW INSTEAD.
FUCK YOU MTV.
FUCK YOUR MOTHER.
FUCK YOUR SISTER.
FUCK YOUR GODDAMN NETWORK.
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE GAYS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE STANS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OF TYRA!
WE WILL COME TO YOUR HEADQUARTERS AND HISS AND SNAP AND VOGUE OUR WAYS INTO YOUR BOADROOM AND FORCE YOUR EXECUTIVES TO CHEW ALL 900,000 UNSOLD COPIES OF MISS KELLY- THE FORGOTTEN MEMBER EDITION.
Kind Regards
The Pop Whore
I am a peaceloving person, I give to charity, I put dollar bills in the collection box, I even let a homeless man eat me out when he told me hadn't had a meal in weeks. As a peaceloving person I believe that we as individuals should spread peace as easily as Alicia Keys spreads her legs.
Mtv- It's important you understand what your name is. Music. You are called Music Television, so like you are meant to be a channel which plays music.
So when two icons decide to put their creative brains together and create something amazing like let's say a music video, you would think that as a channel which calls itself Music Tv would play that video when they said they would.
It's not nice to cheat people, it's not nice to advertise falsely. How would you feel if someone promised you something for weeks and then decided not to give it to you. Huh?
YOUR ASSES BETTER HOPE I DON'T CATCH ONE OF YOUR FUCKING EMPLOYEES COS IF MY CRAZY BLACK ASS DOES I WILL CHARGE MY VIDEO PHONE IN THEIR FUCKING ANUSES YOU FUCKING LIARS. YOU FUCKIN MADE ME TAKE A DAY OFF WORK FOR THIS VIDEO JUST TO TELL ME YOUR FUCKIN ASSES ARE GOING TO AIR IT AT A LATER DATE.
YOU PUT ON THE HILLS ON TIME.
YOU GIVE DULL COUNTRY SINGERS AWARDS THEY DONT DESERVE.
YOU EVEN GIVE BRITNEY GOOD REVIEWS.
YET WHEN TWO ICONS DECIDE TO CREATE AN ICONIC MUSIC VIDEO YOU DECIDE TO TAUNT US AND MAKE US WATCH US SOME DUMASS DATING SHOW INSTEAD.
FUCK YOU MTV.
FUCK YOUR MOTHER.
FUCK YOUR SISTER.
FUCK YOUR GODDAMN NETWORK.
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE GAYS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE STANS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OF TYRA!
WE WILL COME TO YOUR HEADQUARTERS AND HISS AND SNAP AND VOGUE OUR WAYS INTO YOUR BOADROOM AND FORCE YOUR EXECUTIVES TO CHEW ALL 900,000 UNSOLD COPIES OF MISS KELLY- THE FORGOTTEN MEMBER EDITION.
Kind Regards
The Pop Whore
Make up your own fucking heading!
I won't waste time with a witty introduction or humorous haha content probably bitten off the Beyonceitis message board, I'll just hop right into this bitch.
As you know I am one of the only people in this world who appreciates how important Miss. Fenty is- in every generation there must be a pop tart who poses, gives us great tracks, has a wicked style and poses some more and her "nemesis" must be an pop artist who innovates, give us legendary tracks, has a wicked style and poses alot.
In the 80s, Madonna was that pop tart and Cyndi Lauper was that pop artist.
In the late 90s, Britney was that pop tart and Beyonce' was that pop artist.
In the noughties, Britney and Rihanna are those pop tarts and Lady Gaga and Sasha Fierce are those pop artists.
Now i'm not throwing shade on Britney or Rihanna- collecting music written by European producers whose names you can't pronounce can't be easy and going on tours where the least interesting aspect of that tour is yourself can't be easy either but for some reason we love them because in everybody's mind lies what I call The Stupido.
Whilst watching awards shows our Stupido works overtime switching itself on and off everytime a new artist gets on stage. For example, here is how the stupido will work on an upcoming award show.
8.20pm- Ciara opens up the show- (ignoro turns on)
8.35 pm- Rihanna takes to the stage to perform Pussy Like This (stupido turns on)
9.00 pm- Janet Jackson performs Michael Jackson tribute.
9.00:32pm- Beyonce' takes to the stage (stupido turns off- orgams turns on)
10pm- Lady Gaga takes to the stage (intrigue turns on)
11.00pm- Kylie Minogue takes to the stage alongside the Madonna tribute act to perform 50 Y.O (stupido turns on.)
Our Stupidos tell us there's nothing wrong with Tyra Banks defending gay people and then has Bow Wow on the show even though he hasn't got a record, cologne or height assisting machine to promote.
Our stupidos tell us that the reason your favourite artist flopped is because of lack of promotion.
Our stupidos tell us there's nothing strange about Mr.Carter signing artists who look like cheaper variations of his wife.
Our stupidos convince us that En Vogue are going to make a comeback.
However our stupidos aren't all that stupid- if they were we would have noticed that although Ciara had a record out this year she was not asked to perform at he VMAS. We use our ignoros when watching Ciara- our minds process a Ciara video or interview and then force our brains to ignore the content of that video or interview.
Yesterday, my stupido stopped working and then i just got pissed off.
Rihanna.
The Wait is Ova.
What we're we waiting for- it's not as if there's a shortage of posing foreign exports releasing songs that 11 year old girls raised on Hannah Montana think is the best thing since African dick.
I always knew Rihanna was a poser but this video took the biscuit, she didnt even bother to pretend as if she can do anything else.
In Take A Bow, she demonstrated hand-eye coordination when she was driving that nice car really really slow trying to get away from that biracial guy who runs in slow motion.
In SOS, we saw her get her Alicia Keys on and spread her legs.
In Run This Town, she even pointed.
But in The Wait is Ova- she just poses and poses and then poses some more and my stupido just didnt know what to do- my stupido only works when some effort is taken to fuel its stupidity but there was none- just posing and pussy touching.
Rihanna's new record will be hot no doubt, especially now that she's gotten so deep, I mean did you see the way she was bobbing her head and pointing at the camera- that shit is deep. However, I'm going to say this: If i was a straight male with a throbbing penis and Rihanna knocked on my door to borrow some sugar- she could get it.
As you know I am one of the only people in this world who appreciates how important Miss. Fenty is- in every generation there must be a pop tart who poses, gives us great tracks, has a wicked style and poses some more and her "nemesis" must be an pop artist who innovates, give us legendary tracks, has a wicked style and poses alot.
In the 80s, Madonna was that pop tart and Cyndi Lauper was that pop artist.
In the late 90s, Britney was that pop tart and Beyonce' was that pop artist.
In the noughties, Britney and Rihanna are those pop tarts and Lady Gaga and Sasha Fierce are those pop artists.
Now i'm not throwing shade on Britney or Rihanna- collecting music written by European producers whose names you can't pronounce can't be easy and going on tours where the least interesting aspect of that tour is yourself can't be easy either but for some reason we love them because in everybody's mind lies what I call The Stupido.
Whilst watching awards shows our Stupido works overtime switching itself on and off everytime a new artist gets on stage. For example, here is how the stupido will work on an upcoming award show.
8.20pm- Ciara opens up the show- (ignoro turns on)
8.35 pm- Rihanna takes to the stage to perform Pussy Like This (stupido turns on)
9.00 pm- Janet Jackson performs Michael Jackson tribute.
9.00:32pm- Beyonce' takes to the stage (stupido turns off- orgams turns on)
10pm- Lady Gaga takes to the stage (intrigue turns on)
11.00pm- Kylie Minogue takes to the stage alongside the Madonna tribute act to perform 50 Y.O (stupido turns on.)
Our Stupidos tell us there's nothing wrong with Tyra Banks defending gay people and then has Bow Wow on the show even though he hasn't got a record, cologne or height assisting machine to promote.
Our stupidos tell us that the reason your favourite artist flopped is because of lack of promotion.
Our stupidos tell us there's nothing strange about Mr.Carter signing artists who look like cheaper variations of his wife.
Our stupidos convince us that En Vogue are going to make a comeback.
However our stupidos aren't all that stupid- if they were we would have noticed that although Ciara had a record out this year she was not asked to perform at he VMAS. We use our ignoros when watching Ciara- our minds process a Ciara video or interview and then force our brains to ignore the content of that video or interview.
Yesterday, my stupido stopped working and then i just got pissed off.
Rihanna.
The Wait is Ova.
What we're we waiting for- it's not as if there's a shortage of posing foreign exports releasing songs that 11 year old girls raised on Hannah Montana think is the best thing since African dick.
I always knew Rihanna was a poser but this video took the biscuit, she didnt even bother to pretend as if she can do anything else.
In Take A Bow, she demonstrated hand-eye coordination when she was driving that nice car really really slow trying to get away from that biracial guy who runs in slow motion.
In SOS, we saw her get her Alicia Keys on and spread her legs.
In Run This Town, she even pointed.
But in The Wait is Ova- she just poses and poses and then poses some more and my stupido just didnt know what to do- my stupido only works when some effort is taken to fuel its stupidity but there was none- just posing and pussy touching.
Rihanna's new record will be hot no doubt, especially now that she's gotten so deep, I mean did you see the way she was bobbing her head and pointing at the camera- that shit is deep. However, I'm going to say this: If i was a straight male with a throbbing penis and Rihanna knocked on my door to borrow some sugar- she could get it.
Tuesday, 27 October 2009
I betchu wish this was 1983
I find myself learning new shit everyday.
Yesterday I learnt that if you stab Black Eyed Peas record it will start leaking strawberry scented shit.
The day before I discovered that you can't catch Aids from someone who has died from Aids and the day before that someone sent me this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5g3WpE5eWY
Just look at this fool.
You see how I'm always talking about celebrity delusion- how someone can be as shitty as shit itself yet will live their life acting as though they're that bitch because everyone around them laughs and applauds at what they do.
Bobby ain't got shit to do with this.
Your stylist is the same motherfucker who greased the stairs on the Beyonce' Experience and that "Evian" that Clive gave you wasn't Evian at all- but you can't even blame it this shit on the alcohol.
Your finished.
Instead of coming back you need to be going home.
You have been reduced to a studio singer.
You see what drugs can do a bitch kids.
You see what delusion can do to a hoe.
My mother was so embarrased by you when I showed her the link she clutched her pearls, snatched my laptop and prayed that God would bring Phyliss Hyman back from the dead (God you can ignore that part-thanks)
Imagine my horror when I watched the woman who inspired so many make a total aboffoonery of herself on FOREIGN tv, I mean its one thing to fuck up in your home because then you can enjoy respect elsewhere but like swine flu nobody wants your dirty ass anywhere.
We have to remember that what we were seeing was an image, contrived, packaged and sold to us.
Stars are just like us- they shit like YOU do, they have periods like WE do and even lust for the dick like NEYO does.
This is why you shouldn't look to stars for your answers because they're too busy trying to figure out what they need to figure out.
I am aware that Beyonce' fakes her smiles when asked whether she'll be spitting or swallowing.
I am aware that Lady Gaga sometimes looks in the mirror and wonders what life without make up is like and I am aware that Michael Jackson was a moonwalking, kindergaten stalking bleached pervert.
You need to look within yourselves for the answers and realize that YOU DO NOT KNOW your favourite artists, think about the city you're from and the city that you're favourite artist is from- if that artist wasn't an artist would you even know they existed and EVEN if you are from the same city, do you know EVERYSINGLE person in that city. The sooner we realize that stars are nothing but images being created by experts who think they know what we think we need the sooner we'll stop having debates about Michael Jacksons innocence and whether Rihanna can deepthroat or not.
Bye.
Yesterday I learnt that if you stab Black Eyed Peas record it will start leaking strawberry scented shit.
The day before I discovered that you can't catch Aids from someone who has died from Aids and the day before that someone sent me this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5g3WpE5eWY
Just look at this fool.
You see how I'm always talking about celebrity delusion- how someone can be as shitty as shit itself yet will live their life acting as though they're that bitch because everyone around them laughs and applauds at what they do.
Bobby ain't got shit to do with this.
Your stylist is the same motherfucker who greased the stairs on the Beyonce' Experience and that "Evian" that Clive gave you wasn't Evian at all- but you can't even blame it this shit on the alcohol.
Your finished.
Instead of coming back you need to be going home.
You have been reduced to a studio singer.
You see what drugs can do a bitch kids.
You see what delusion can do to a hoe.
My mother was so embarrased by you when I showed her the link she clutched her pearls, snatched my laptop and prayed that God would bring Phyliss Hyman back from the dead (God you can ignore that part-thanks)
Imagine my horror when I watched the woman who inspired so many make a total aboffoonery of herself on FOREIGN tv, I mean its one thing to fuck up in your home because then you can enjoy respect elsewhere but like swine flu nobody wants your dirty ass anywhere.
We have to remember that what we were seeing was an image, contrived, packaged and sold to us.
Stars are just like us- they shit like YOU do, they have periods like WE do and even lust for the dick like NEYO does.
This is why you shouldn't look to stars for your answers because they're too busy trying to figure out what they need to figure out.
I am aware that Beyonce' fakes her smiles when asked whether she'll be spitting or swallowing.
I am aware that Lady Gaga sometimes looks in the mirror and wonders what life without make up is like and I am aware that Michael Jackson was a moonwalking, kindergaten stalking bleached pervert.
You need to look within yourselves for the answers and realize that YOU DO NOT KNOW your favourite artists, think about the city you're from and the city that you're favourite artist is from- if that artist wasn't an artist would you even know they existed and EVEN if you are from the same city, do you know EVERYSINGLE person in that city. The sooner we realize that stars are nothing but images being created by experts who think they know what we think we need the sooner we'll stop having debates about Michael Jacksons innocence and whether Rihanna can deepthroat or not.
Bye.
Saturday, 10 October 2009
I Am A Woman In Love
So its happened.
My unsuspecting ass never thought I'd see the day.
The dramatic guinea pig had to quit acting class.
Semenya had to stop shaving.
Ike J-setted in his grave.
I wish I could say I was suprised by this all.
I wish I could say haha, but I can't but it seems as though I have another flop to kick.
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tESSkDz9uio
You see, when an artist is surrounded by people who continuously tell that artist that their shit is made of gold that artist will make decisions which are based on delusion rather than common sense. It's why Kelly Rowland still thinks lack of promotion is the reason for her commercial short comings and it's the reason Alicia Keys still thinks anybody is convinced by anything she does.
When an artist has a bad patch in their career and comes back succesfully, that artist may feel the need to milk the moment just in case it doesn't last. Because it doesn't last.
Memoirs Of An Imperfect Vocalist.
Memoirs of An Imperfect Icon.
Memoirs of an Imperfect Delusionist.
When you have lower first week sales than Janet Jackson you know your boat is sinking harder than Titanic with Sean Kingston on board.
Mariah fans have indeed had enough- and I've been saying that for years- when someone grows up on Vision Of Love and is then forced to accept Obsessed the immediate reaction of anybody with a head is to reject it and so they have.
Mariah has succesfully cheapened herself by having Twitter, marrying a D-Lister and creating diss tracks.
When a celebrity is mysterious and silent about certain things it creates a mystery around the artist and so the fans purchase whatever that artist puts out so they can feel as though they own a part of that artist- it's why Britney is still selling out shows.
It's why Rihanna is so sensual and so exotic.
It's why we watch Jay Z interviews, Jay Z was rapping since before I was born yet I had no interest in him until he started jizzing on Sasha's face- when we watched him on Oprah we were hoping he'd say the things Beyonce' wouldn't and the feeling the obsession we have with celebrity privacy fuels our respect for them.
When we know too much- when we know you had quasedillas for breakfast and that you and Kimora are downloading African porn whilst breastfeeding your foreign exports all the mystery your publicists spent years creating is thrown out of the window.
This is why we see nothing wrong with watching Michael Jackson interviews when we know all he ever did was lie, we knew he wasn't straight but we convinced ourselves that he was because if we denied ourselves that image of him spooning that white lady we'd have nothing else to base our love of his private life on.
Mariah dear- it's over.
Your acting career isnt going to kick off just because you got a role which doesnt require facial expression or physical movement. You are only edible in that role because you speak really really really slow meaning that every word you say is given the chance to breathe, a good actress can stammer, scream, yell and fart whilst giving a monologue
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7sIkj4nuh8
Mariah will never be able to use her name to sell anything and so now she will require flawless live shows just like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlHyN1eJgTI
My unsuspecting ass never thought I'd see the day.
The dramatic guinea pig had to quit acting class.
Semenya had to stop shaving.
Ike J-setted in his grave.
I wish I could say I was suprised by this all.
I wish I could say haha, but I can't but it seems as though I have another flop to kick.
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tESSkDz9uio
You see, when an artist is surrounded by people who continuously tell that artist that their shit is made of gold that artist will make decisions which are based on delusion rather than common sense. It's why Kelly Rowland still thinks lack of promotion is the reason for her commercial short comings and it's the reason Alicia Keys still thinks anybody is convinced by anything she does.
When an artist has a bad patch in their career and comes back succesfully, that artist may feel the need to milk the moment just in case it doesn't last. Because it doesn't last.
Memoirs Of An Imperfect Vocalist.
Memoirs of An Imperfect Icon.
Memoirs of an Imperfect Delusionist.
When you have lower first week sales than Janet Jackson you know your boat is sinking harder than Titanic with Sean Kingston on board.
Mariah fans have indeed had enough- and I've been saying that for years- when someone grows up on Vision Of Love and is then forced to accept Obsessed the immediate reaction of anybody with a head is to reject it and so they have.
Mariah has succesfully cheapened herself by having Twitter, marrying a D-Lister and creating diss tracks.
When a celebrity is mysterious and silent about certain things it creates a mystery around the artist and so the fans purchase whatever that artist puts out so they can feel as though they own a part of that artist- it's why Britney is still selling out shows.
It's why Rihanna is so sensual and so exotic.
It's why we watch Jay Z interviews, Jay Z was rapping since before I was born yet I had no interest in him until he started jizzing on Sasha's face- when we watched him on Oprah we were hoping he'd say the things Beyonce' wouldn't and the feeling the obsession we have with celebrity privacy fuels our respect for them.
When we know too much- when we know you had quasedillas for breakfast and that you and Kimora are downloading African porn whilst breastfeeding your foreign exports all the mystery your publicists spent years creating is thrown out of the window.
This is why we see nothing wrong with watching Michael Jackson interviews when we know all he ever did was lie, we knew he wasn't straight but we convinced ourselves that he was because if we denied ourselves that image of him spooning that white lady we'd have nothing else to base our love of his private life on.
Mariah dear- it's over.
Your acting career isnt going to kick off just because you got a role which doesnt require facial expression or physical movement. You are only edible in that role because you speak really really really slow meaning that every word you say is given the chance to breathe, a good actress can stammer, scream, yell and fart whilst giving a monologue
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7sIkj4nuh8
Mariah will never be able to use her name to sell anything and so now she will require flawless live shows just like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlHyN1eJgTI
Monday, 5 October 2009
That baby should jus' go head and abort itself
Ive been told by my pimp that I beat around the bush so Im just going to hop right in on it like my name is motherfucking Tigger-however instead of TTFN I will say TTTS (Time To Throw Shade.)
If MTO are correct (lawfagivemefareferencingthosehoes) and Mathew is indeed the father of a child which is to be conceived by some bafoon- I want to everyone to know that as long as Beyonce' uses Ciara's album booklet as a period pad Mathew and the supposed mother will NEVER find peace.
That baby might as well take its umbilical cord and hang itself if it is Mathews because we Sasha Fierce Representatives will NEVER accept a Knowles unless it is made up of the spicy womb of Celestine and the ATM dick of Mathew.
If all this is true- Juelz will have an uncle younger than him
Juelz dont play that.
Juelz dont even respect the niggers that work the rides at the fair- you think hes going to accept some illegit?
And to the trollope herself- so I guess you thought you were going to conceive the secomd Beyonce'- BY GOD I hope you conceive a 45th Gary Coleman.
And Celestine- for your sake I hope this isnt true- I am part Haitain myself and I know how much vengeance potions cost too make, if Mathew did indeed dick down that whore then I want you to know that I will create an entire blog documenting your life as a single gal about town and your endevours with men much younger than yourself.
I'll call it:
Celes-Teen.
If MTO are correct (lawfagivemefareferencingthosehoes) and Mathew is indeed the father of a child which is to be conceived by some bafoon- I want to everyone to know that as long as Beyonce' uses Ciara's album booklet as a period pad Mathew and the supposed mother will NEVER find peace.
That baby might as well take its umbilical cord and hang itself if it is Mathews because we Sasha Fierce Representatives will NEVER accept a Knowles unless it is made up of the spicy womb of Celestine and the ATM dick of Mathew.
If all this is true- Juelz will have an uncle younger than him
Juelz dont play that.
Juelz dont even respect the niggers that work the rides at the fair- you think hes going to accept some illegit?
And to the trollope herself- so I guess you thought you were going to conceive the secomd Beyonce'- BY GOD I hope you conceive a 45th Gary Coleman.
And Celestine- for your sake I hope this isnt true- I am part Haitain myself and I know how much vengeance potions cost too make, if Mathew did indeed dick down that whore then I want you to know that I will create an entire blog documenting your life as a single gal about town and your endevours with men much younger than yourself.
I'll call it:
Celes-Teen.
Friday, 18 September 2009
Stupid Shit Part Trois
If your face looks as though it is an eight sided shape, you should have stayed home.
If you look like Bow Wow after getting the hook up at Hotel Sew-Wanda, you should have stayed home.
And if you look as though you got your outfit from the 69 cence store, you should have stayed on twitter.
I didnt blog about this straight away because I didn't know how, I was so shocked, and as I get older I've noticed that like Beyonce' when I'm shocked I really dont know how to act and do this weird thing where it looks like my mouth is attacking my cheeks.
What posessed that munchkin to jump on stage with art personified (Jay Z) and Homewrecker Director (Alicia) is beyond me. Where the fuck was Julius? Where the fuck was any security, what if it had been Mashonda who ran up on the stage and smashed her son's glass baby bottle across Alicia's pretty little biracial head.
These kids ain't go no respect.
"I was fillin da moment ya-no cos dis i new yawk- im fram new yawk and so like i was fillin da moment and had to get on da stage."
You octagon faced fool.
You short and stupid whore.
You flop.
The last thing you released was a Direct Message and you think you have the right to jump on stage with legends.
The worst thing was that Jay actually tried his best to push her off by first tapping her and then getting real close to Alicia (back the fuck up) to show the audience that the only two people that should have been on that stage where he and Alicia.
If it had been Rihanna- I would have been like oh hell to the motherfucking yeah- if it had been Beyonce' I would have jizzed in my pants- if it had been Blu Cantrell I would have drawn for my shank.
To me- Lil Mama's actions only prove how even the most unsuccesful of "artists" can be delusional.
Delusion tells you that wearing some cheap ass pink loin cloth as a top is normal. Stupid whore.
Delusion tells you that anybody who thinks what you did was stupid is "hater."
Nobody has time to hate you because there is nothing to hate with your unsuccesful ass. Stupid whore.
Aren't you worried you haven't released a record since 2007- aren't you concerned that your face looks like it could break the ice.
Whore.
If you look like Bow Wow after getting the hook up at Hotel Sew-Wanda, you should have stayed home.
And if you look as though you got your outfit from the 69 cence store, you should have stayed on twitter.
I didnt blog about this straight away because I didn't know how, I was so shocked, and as I get older I've noticed that like Beyonce' when I'm shocked I really dont know how to act and do this weird thing where it looks like my mouth is attacking my cheeks.
What posessed that munchkin to jump on stage with art personified (Jay Z) and Homewrecker Director (Alicia) is beyond me. Where the fuck was Julius? Where the fuck was any security, what if it had been Mashonda who ran up on the stage and smashed her son's glass baby bottle across Alicia's pretty little biracial head.
These kids ain't go no respect.
"I was fillin da moment ya-no cos dis i new yawk- im fram new yawk and so like i was fillin da moment and had to get on da stage."
You octagon faced fool.
You short and stupid whore.
You flop.
The last thing you released was a Direct Message and you think you have the right to jump on stage with legends.
The worst thing was that Jay actually tried his best to push her off by first tapping her and then getting real close to Alicia (back the fuck up) to show the audience that the only two people that should have been on that stage where he and Alicia.
If it had been Rihanna- I would have been like oh hell to the motherfucking yeah- if it had been Beyonce' I would have jizzed in my pants- if it had been Blu Cantrell I would have drawn for my shank.
To me- Lil Mama's actions only prove how even the most unsuccesful of "artists" can be delusional.
Delusion tells you that wearing some cheap ass pink loin cloth as a top is normal. Stupid whore.
Delusion tells you that anybody who thinks what you did was stupid is "hater."
Nobody has time to hate you because there is nothing to hate with your unsuccesful ass. Stupid whore.
Aren't you worried you haven't released a record since 2007- aren't you concerned that your face looks like it could break the ice.
Whore.
Monday, 14 September 2009
Team Taylor
"And the award goes to...."
Celestine pops open the champagne, Mathew writes Nava a cheque, Juelz starts Jerking out, Mary J hands in her notice.
"Taylor Swift."
I'm actually not suprised that Taylor Swift beat Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Katy Perry and Pink to the award after all Taylor is the best performer out of all of them, she is the most talented and innovative and to be honest- i think that Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Katy Perry and Pink are simply carbon copies of the bright eyed blonde haired formula that labels have been manufacturing since they saw how it worked for Britney.
What does Kanye know about music videos anyway? How DARE he claim Single Ladies was one of the best videos of all time- didn't he see Taylor's video, didn't he see the care, thought and attention given to Taylor's splendiferous vocals and performance.
Taylor you did indeed deserve that award over Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Pink and Katy Perry. Kanye's just jealous because he wishes he was a blonde haired country music singing mechanical dummy like you are- Beyonce' is just another untalented bitch who hates you for being more talented than she is.
Thankyou MTV for showing those dumb Beyonce' fans that just because a woman spends a decade tearing up stages, singing live and putting on a show doesnt mean she deserves to win anything.
Thankyou very much to Kanye West who totally made a fool of himself by claiming Single Ladies deserved to win the award for Best Female Video.
Can't wait to see Britney perform next year!!!!
Celestine pops open the champagne, Mathew writes Nava a cheque, Juelz starts Jerking out, Mary J hands in her notice.
"Taylor Swift."
I'm actually not suprised that Taylor Swift beat Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Katy Perry and Pink to the award after all Taylor is the best performer out of all of them, she is the most talented and innovative and to be honest- i think that Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Katy Perry and Pink are simply carbon copies of the bright eyed blonde haired formula that labels have been manufacturing since they saw how it worked for Britney.
What does Kanye know about music videos anyway? How DARE he claim Single Ladies was one of the best videos of all time- didn't he see Taylor's video, didn't he see the care, thought and attention given to Taylor's splendiferous vocals and performance.
Taylor you did indeed deserve that award over Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Pink and Katy Perry. Kanye's just jealous because he wishes he was a blonde haired country music singing mechanical dummy like you are- Beyonce' is just another untalented bitch who hates you for being more talented than she is.
Thankyou MTV for showing those dumb Beyonce' fans that just because a woman spends a decade tearing up stages, singing live and putting on a show doesnt mean she deserves to win anything.
Thankyou very much to Kanye West who totally made a fool of himself by claiming Single Ladies deserved to win the award for Best Female Video.
Can't wait to see Britney perform next year!!!!
Saturday, 12 September 2009
Sigh
Irrelevance.
Just because the livest audience anywhere scream when you make an appearance on 106 and Park does not mean you are relevant to anything.
Just because you get 100 followers a day on Twitter doesn't mean you are relevant to anything.
And just because the people you role with have been able to convince you that Neyo hasn't taken your seat on the R'n'b Thug train does mean you are relevant to anything.
Getting fucked in the mouth by a geri curled oompaloompa can fuck with a niggers head, I don't blame you trying to come at me on twitter Marques- I mean i'd be mad too if my last few records sold less units than Semenya could sell cosmetics.
I'm sure that you're a great person but if you really can't see that you are indeed irrelevant then it just proves how delusional even F-Listers like you can be. To put things into perspective for you I've put together a game.
Beyonce
Rihanna
Jay Z
Neyo
Lady Gaga
Madonna
Lil Wayne
J.Boog
Brandy
Mariah
Kelly Rowland
50 Cent
Kanye West
Bow Wow
Omarion
Britney Spears
Whitney Houston
Marques Houston
I'd like you to arrange all of these artists in order of relevance with the most relevant being at the top and the least relevant right at the bottom. If you're not too busy washing Chris' cum off your tongue- Id appreciate it if you could DM your list via Twitter.
Thankyou.
Just because the livest audience anywhere scream when you make an appearance on 106 and Park does not mean you are relevant to anything.
Just because you get 100 followers a day on Twitter doesn't mean you are relevant to anything.
And just because the people you role with have been able to convince you that Neyo hasn't taken your seat on the R'n'b Thug train does mean you are relevant to anything.
Getting fucked in the mouth by a geri curled oompaloompa can fuck with a niggers head, I don't blame you trying to come at me on twitter Marques- I mean i'd be mad too if my last few records sold less units than Semenya could sell cosmetics.
I'm sure that you're a great person but if you really can't see that you are indeed irrelevant then it just proves how delusional even F-Listers like you can be. To put things into perspective for you I've put together a game.
Beyonce
Rihanna
Jay Z
Neyo
Lady Gaga
Madonna
Lil Wayne
J.Boog
Brandy
Mariah
Kelly Rowland
50 Cent
Kanye West
Bow Wow
Omarion
Britney Spears
Whitney Houston
Marques Houston
I'd like you to arrange all of these artists in order of relevance with the most relevant being at the top and the least relevant right at the bottom. If you're not too busy washing Chris' cum off your tongue- Id appreciate it if you could DM your list via Twitter.
Thankyou.
Monday, 7 September 2009
Oprah come get this ba'y
"Do you remember beating up Rihanna?"
"Erm- like I never been vah-lent before- y'nawaddamean."
"How do you feel when you see that picture of her?".
"Like i wasn't sure if it was altered- it was like ...wow."
I would say dumb nigger but I spend all my time trying to prove to people how stupid it is for black people to call each other nigger's and then turn around and say how much they are against slavery but in this case i'm going to have to let Uncle Tom out. Dumb Nigger.
Dumb niggers can't tell when they are being patronized.
Dumb niggers bring their lawyers onto Larry King because they can't answer questions about shit that THEY did.
Dumb niggers find a way to incorporate 90210 into their vocab when discussing domestic abuse, "It was like...wow."
Yes it was like wow when you thumped, jumped and discombumbed Rihanna and her covergirl face and though there is no excuse for a man or boy to hit a woman, there is no denying the fact that when a bitch signs up to fuck with a dumb nigger that is what she is asking for.
His speech or lack of it would be enough to put any intelligent woman off, either his tongue is too big for his mouth or they didn't teach grammar in his school because that dumb nigger couldn't put a sentence together even if the words were dipped in glue.
His mother is another joke shedding her crocodile tears and talking about how she has no idea where he got the urge to beat, bite, kick and punch women from. Take a look in the family portrait you dumb bitch- it's clear to see that he was taking notes from that woman beater you once called a boyfriend. Dumb nigger.
And Chris is not the only person at fault here. All those celebrities who could have said something but didn't are just as bad as he is.
Beyonce- sitting, smiling and nodding on Larry King when asked about it just isn't good enough. You are THE MOST POWERFUL Icon of our time and there are a lot of dumb kids out there who don't have older brothers and sisters to preach the importance of being anti-domestic abuse that need Powerful Icons like you to enforce how wrong it is to be violent. If you're always talking about female empowerement what would have been more empowering for women if they saw Beyonce' openly supporting and defending her husband's employee.
Rihanna was hiyaahhed, kazaamed, and rastalombombarded and nobody- not even someone as intelligent or as outspoken as Alicia Keys said anything to speak out against the sickening nature of her attack. When I think of how frightening it must have been for Rihanna to be under those merciless sucker punches it makes me cry, she must have thought she was auditioning for What's Love Got To Do With It Part Deux.
This only proves my point about the importance of having constant discussions with younger members of your family to enforce a sense of self confidence into them so that they 1.stay away from dumb niggers and 2. they react in a responsible way if they are K.O'd by a dumb nigger.
It is not the job of dumb niggers in the mainstream to raise our kids but in a society where contrived images seep through the most unsuspecting mediums it is important to remind our children of what is right and what is wrong just in case the people we expec to speak out against what is wrong are too afraid to.
"Erm- like I never been vah-lent before- y'nawaddamean."
"How do you feel when you see that picture of her?".
"Like i wasn't sure if it was altered- it was like ...wow."
I would say dumb nigger but I spend all my time trying to prove to people how stupid it is for black people to call each other nigger's and then turn around and say how much they are against slavery but in this case i'm going to have to let Uncle Tom out. Dumb Nigger.
Dumb niggers can't tell when they are being patronized.
Dumb niggers bring their lawyers onto Larry King because they can't answer questions about shit that THEY did.
Dumb niggers find a way to incorporate 90210 into their vocab when discussing domestic abuse, "It was like...wow."
Yes it was like wow when you thumped, jumped and discombumbed Rihanna and her covergirl face and though there is no excuse for a man or boy to hit a woman, there is no denying the fact that when a bitch signs up to fuck with a dumb nigger that is what she is asking for.
His speech or lack of it would be enough to put any intelligent woman off, either his tongue is too big for his mouth or they didn't teach grammar in his school because that dumb nigger couldn't put a sentence together even if the words were dipped in glue.
His mother is another joke shedding her crocodile tears and talking about how she has no idea where he got the urge to beat, bite, kick and punch women from. Take a look in the family portrait you dumb bitch- it's clear to see that he was taking notes from that woman beater you once called a boyfriend. Dumb nigger.
And Chris is not the only person at fault here. All those celebrities who could have said something but didn't are just as bad as he is.
Beyonce- sitting, smiling and nodding on Larry King when asked about it just isn't good enough. You are THE MOST POWERFUL Icon of our time and there are a lot of dumb kids out there who don't have older brothers and sisters to preach the importance of being anti-domestic abuse that need Powerful Icons like you to enforce how wrong it is to be violent. If you're always talking about female empowerement what would have been more empowering for women if they saw Beyonce' openly supporting and defending her husband's employee.
Rihanna was hiyaahhed, kazaamed, and rastalombombarded and nobody- not even someone as intelligent or as outspoken as Alicia Keys said anything to speak out against the sickening nature of her attack. When I think of how frightening it must have been for Rihanna to be under those merciless sucker punches it makes me cry, she must have thought she was auditioning for What's Love Got To Do With It Part Deux.
This only proves my point about the importance of having constant discussions with younger members of your family to enforce a sense of self confidence into them so that they 1.stay away from dumb niggers and 2. they react in a responsible way if they are K.O'd by a dumb nigger.
It is not the job of dumb niggers in the mainstream to raise our kids but in a society where contrived images seep through the most unsuspecting mediums it is important to remind our children of what is right and what is wrong just in case the people we expec to speak out against what is wrong are too afraid to.
Thursday, 3 September 2009
Where my money at Micky?
After working her way through a KingSized Box of Kleenex's on E! Mrs. Aguilera decided to hop up on the PopWhore's satirical lap and have a one to one on love, sex and marriage.
PW: So the last time you were number 1 was when you were helping Mya and Pink spread some Lady Marmalade all over your toast, what have you achieved since then?
Baby Jane: I got married and had a son.
PW: So you basically got fucked, that's all you really did. Anyways- so what are your thoughts on Britney's current state in the industry.
BJ: It's no suprise, those fuckers were stupid when I came out and stupid now- only stupid people would pay to see someone drag their camel toe around stage lip synching repetitive and stupid lyrics, so fuck Britney- that's how I feel about that slut.
PW: I agree.
BJ: You do?
PW: Oh yes, she is indeed the original Pop Culture whore, Pop Culture uses her as a poster child for anything it wants to, success or a melt down, beauty and then ugliness. Pop Culture fucked Britney so hard that she still hasn't caught her breath which is why singing live is virtually impossible for her to do and since she is sucking Pop Culture's dick Pop Culture sees no problem with discriminating against artists who actually do their job in favour of Britney who hasn't actually promoted a record since her toxic was running under.
BJ: And what am I?
PW: You're the whore that isn't actually a whore because nobody ever comes to you for shit, Pop Culture never wanted you but you forced your way and have been forced to accept the fact that you will always be the last resort, for example-the only time an award show organiser would call you to perform in 2005 was if Beyonce' is too pretending to be impressed by the artists that her husband keeps signing and Britney was too busy figuring out how holding notes worked.
Today- the only time an award show organiser would call you up is if Beyonce' is too busy draining millions out of her disciples on tour and if Britney was too busy trying to figure out how holding notes worked and if Rihanna was too busy thinking about what to wear to that award show and if Lady Gaga was too busy writing a thesis on Pop Culture Pussy to perform on the show.
BJ: How dare you?! I'm a fucking legend, I've been around for more than a decade, everyone knows my name and everyone is scared of me.
PW: Like HIV. You don't automatically become an Icon or a living legend the second the tenth anniversary of your first number 1 comes around, turning into an Icon means you are iconic of the time your art exists in.
Per example, even if the only video Michael Jackson ever released was Smooth Criminal, he would still be an icon because that video symbolised every single aspect of his creative genius which then became iconic of the time that he existed in, in the same way Lady Gaga is iconic because of her domination and her succesful exposure of Avant-Garde High Brow Pop Music.
Beyonce' is an Icon because she leads and revolutionises the way in which we as consumers view Contemporary Pop Music and performance style. Like Janet Jackson you will never be/are no longer an Icon because you stopped/never were iconic of your time. Like Janet Jackson your foolish pride is the reason you can't announce a new release without being heckled at.
Janet is no longer an Icon because she was only an Icon because her music meant something, when it stopped meaning shit so did she and her fans alongside mainstream media abandoned her. Because Janet Jackson hasn't got any notable talent such a good singing voice, it became impossible for her to do anything about her being blacklisted because the only thing she was good for was dancing and since nobody was giving her stages to dance on- she simply became an expiring has been artist who we really should have ignored the second the new millenium arrived.
You on the other hand can sing, but so can a lot of artists, you've never gone on a tour which people foam at the mouth about, you've never released an MTV video (see definition at end of post), you've never even given a performance which your fans can reference when in an argument with over zealous Mariah fans. You're just a joke.
BJ: I don't give a fuck what you say- and those other artists you mentioned like Lady Gaga can go eat a pussy- i don't even know who that is.
PW: When you said that around this time last year you cemented the idea in everyone's minds that you will never be recognised as an Icon. The largest consumers of popular music are teenagers, if it was OAPS it would be your grandmother and not Rihanna on the cover of Rolling Stone. When you say that you don't know who an artist who is extremely popular with teenagers is all you are doing is confirming that you are out of touch with everything which then makes you unattractive and then means that your fan base will simply age without being rejuvanted by a injection of younger fans. You bit Lady Gaga's style because when she first came out in the US The Fame was a commercial failure and so you and your team of overweight stylists thought that Lady Gaga would simply remain an underground artist who you could rip and tear off when you felt like it, little did you know that an international audience would propel Lady Gaga into US Pop Culture which resulted in higher sales and bigger singles which flaunted off her individual style which then made it apparent that your dusty was indeed a swagger thief.
BJ: I'm gonna go, I've got studio time to waste.
PW: I hope you learn't something from today.
BJ: Go suck on a spiced foreskin.
MTV Video: Single Video or series of Videos released by an artist or band which are of a memorable and iconic nature worthy of MTV respect as MTV is the official home of all music videos (www.youtube.com being the younger, sexier, cheaper alternative.)
Example:
"That new U2 Video is such an MTV Video."
"I'm kinda mad that Lady Gaga's Paparazzi got leaked on the internet- that video is such a MTV Video it deserved its own premiere."
PW: So the last time you were number 1 was when you were helping Mya and Pink spread some Lady Marmalade all over your toast, what have you achieved since then?
Baby Jane: I got married and had a son.
PW: So you basically got fucked, that's all you really did. Anyways- so what are your thoughts on Britney's current state in the industry.
BJ: It's no suprise, those fuckers were stupid when I came out and stupid now- only stupid people would pay to see someone drag their camel toe around stage lip synching repetitive and stupid lyrics, so fuck Britney- that's how I feel about that slut.
PW: I agree.
BJ: You do?
PW: Oh yes, she is indeed the original Pop Culture whore, Pop Culture uses her as a poster child for anything it wants to, success or a melt down, beauty and then ugliness. Pop Culture fucked Britney so hard that she still hasn't caught her breath which is why singing live is virtually impossible for her to do and since she is sucking Pop Culture's dick Pop Culture sees no problem with discriminating against artists who actually do their job in favour of Britney who hasn't actually promoted a record since her toxic was running under.
BJ: And what am I?
PW: You're the whore that isn't actually a whore because nobody ever comes to you for shit, Pop Culture never wanted you but you forced your way and have been forced to accept the fact that you will always be the last resort, for example-the only time an award show organiser would call you to perform in 2005 was if Beyonce' is too pretending to be impressed by the artists that her husband keeps signing and Britney was too busy figuring out how holding notes worked.
Today- the only time an award show organiser would call you up is if Beyonce' is too busy draining millions out of her disciples on tour and if Britney was too busy trying to figure out how holding notes worked and if Rihanna was too busy thinking about what to wear to that award show and if Lady Gaga was too busy writing a thesis on Pop Culture Pussy to perform on the show.
BJ: How dare you?! I'm a fucking legend, I've been around for more than a decade, everyone knows my name and everyone is scared of me.
PW: Like HIV. You don't automatically become an Icon or a living legend the second the tenth anniversary of your first number 1 comes around, turning into an Icon means you are iconic of the time your art exists in.
Per example, even if the only video Michael Jackson ever released was Smooth Criminal, he would still be an icon because that video symbolised every single aspect of his creative genius which then became iconic of the time that he existed in, in the same way Lady Gaga is iconic because of her domination and her succesful exposure of Avant-Garde High Brow Pop Music.
Beyonce' is an Icon because she leads and revolutionises the way in which we as consumers view Contemporary Pop Music and performance style. Like Janet Jackson you will never be/are no longer an Icon because you stopped/never were iconic of your time. Like Janet Jackson your foolish pride is the reason you can't announce a new release without being heckled at.
Janet is no longer an Icon because she was only an Icon because her music meant something, when it stopped meaning shit so did she and her fans alongside mainstream media abandoned her. Because Janet Jackson hasn't got any notable talent such a good singing voice, it became impossible for her to do anything about her being blacklisted because the only thing she was good for was dancing and since nobody was giving her stages to dance on- she simply became an expiring has been artist who we really should have ignored the second the new millenium arrived.
You on the other hand can sing, but so can a lot of artists, you've never gone on a tour which people foam at the mouth about, you've never released an MTV video (see definition at end of post), you've never even given a performance which your fans can reference when in an argument with over zealous Mariah fans. You're just a joke.
BJ: I don't give a fuck what you say- and those other artists you mentioned like Lady Gaga can go eat a pussy- i don't even know who that is.
PW: When you said that around this time last year you cemented the idea in everyone's minds that you will never be recognised as an Icon. The largest consumers of popular music are teenagers, if it was OAPS it would be your grandmother and not Rihanna on the cover of Rolling Stone. When you say that you don't know who an artist who is extremely popular with teenagers is all you are doing is confirming that you are out of touch with everything which then makes you unattractive and then means that your fan base will simply age without being rejuvanted by a injection of younger fans. You bit Lady Gaga's style because when she first came out in the US The Fame was a commercial failure and so you and your team of overweight stylists thought that Lady Gaga would simply remain an underground artist who you could rip and tear off when you felt like it, little did you know that an international audience would propel Lady Gaga into US Pop Culture which resulted in higher sales and bigger singles which flaunted off her individual style which then made it apparent that your dusty was indeed a swagger thief.
BJ: I'm gonna go, I've got studio time to waste.
PW: I hope you learn't something from today.
BJ: Go suck on a spiced foreskin.
MTV Video: Single Video or series of Videos released by an artist or band which are of a memorable and iconic nature worthy of MTV respect as MTV is the official home of all music videos (www.youtube.com being the younger, sexier, cheaper alternative.)
Example:
"That new U2 Video is such an MTV Video."
"I'm kinda mad that Lady Gaga's Paparazzi got leaked on the internet- that video is such a MTV Video it deserved its own premiere."
Tuesday, 1 September 2009
Can we black it up please?
Tyra Banks.
Model.
Mogul.
Good Samaritan.
Owner of a shoulder to cry on.
President of The Knowles De La Familia Fan Club.
Condescending double standard promoting bitch.
I love me some Tyra Banks, I really do- in fact Tyra Banks is one of the most important figures in the world because she shows that not all black women look and act the same and that for every ghetto finger pointing hoodrat competing for "love" on VH1 there is a proffesional well spoken lady proving that black is a shade not a lifestyle.
But I can't help but be mad at Tyra, I wish I could leave Tyra's pussy to be great, but I can't because then I'd be a hypocrite, I mock everyone else for promoting double standards and then try and turn a blind eye to Tyra who is guilty of most double standards.
Like Beyonce, Tyra often plays a game where she will "street it up" when she needs to appear down with the kids and appear to be more "stereotypically black." It's why Beyonce' will intentionally incorporate slang words into her vocab when appearing on 106&Park and its why Tyra Banks said "Kiss my fat BLACK ass."
What has you being black got to do with you not being able to control your weight?
Tyra Banks said "BLACK ass" because she was playing the race card, what she was actually saying was, "If you laugh at me because I look like a beached lace fronted whale you're actually laughing at black people because most of my fellow black mamas have curves, right?".
No Tyra- you only said black because it was the pussy way out.
You being black has got nothing to do with you putting on weight and I'm so fucking tired of black women being perceived as the "mamas".
That racial stereotype of the black woman being a"mama" comes from when the most maternal black women would be in charge of raising the white chi'ren on the mas'ers plantation, now it is exploited so all big black women in film and tv have to be maternal, warm, loving and smiling, "come here cha- mama's here now cha."
Tyra Banks also puts on her "mama" act when on ANTM, she is given the authority to yell and embarass girls because "when my mama shouts at me like this it's because she cares." Shut the fuck up- you were mad at Tiffany because she didn't cry when YOU kicked her off the show and since you get kicks out of watching other people cry it pissed you off that she didn't.
Tyra Banks for some reason is under the impression that she also has the right to act the mediator in situations that do not involve her, like when she had the bitches from Bad Girls Club on the show.
She has succesfully manipulated various racial stereotypes to present herself a scolding/loving mama when all she actually does is embarass them when they do not react in the way that she wants them to.
She is also guilty of double standards when she joked and laughed with Ray J about the sex tape even though he admitted that it was HIS idea but then gave Kim Kardashian a hard time about the same tape.
Aren't you always talking about female empowerment?
Vrai or Faux?
Tyra Banks did not realize that she was saying "its ok for a guy but not for a girl" when she grilled Kim about why and how she did the sex tape but then discussed penis sizes with Ray J.
Like I always say, if Tyra Banks is REALLY concerned with loose women why doesn't she get Alicia Keys on the show.
When it comes to Beyonce', her "mama" antics came to a head when she only decided to mention that her father had to be escorted to school when he was younger due to racism when she needed a reason to support Obama in the election. Although I'm sure Beyonce' cared very deeply about Obama's cause, she was not able to give a clear reason as to why she was supporting Obama.
"He's so intelligent" doesn't mean shit.
Hitler was intelligent.
Saddam Hussein was intelligent.
George Bush is int-
Mariah is another perpetrator, only announcing that her daddy was chacklet when it was deemed as being cool to be black with emergence of Boyz 2 Men and Aaliyah.
Now I am very aware of the importance of women like Beyonce' and Tyra Banks in pop culture as they prove alongside Naomi and Oprah that not all women of color come from the same background or have the same views or even share the same culture, but it is very annoying when negative racial stereotypes are used to enhance or "sweeten" their own personal image.
You may accuse me of black female bashing, but I think black people as a culture have come far enough without us all having to constantly compliment each other just in case mainstream media forgets to.
Yes Beyonce' is THE BEST FEMALE ENTERTAINER OF ALL TIME.
And Yes Tyra Banks existance is crucial to the image of black women in pop culture but until we stop expecting every single black women we see to be the comforting sweet mama or the ghetto uneducated slut we will forever be stuck in boxes.
When it comes to BET, they are a joke.
"This song is too pop".
To suggest that a song is "too pop" for BET only promotes the idea that the only genre of music black artists should be doing is "R'n'b," when we know for a fact that the majority of these "r'n'b" stars haven't released an "r'n'b" single a day in their fabricated careers. How would BET feel if MTV decided that Keisha Cole was too "r'n'b" for them, there would be an uproar.
Although there was once a time where being black worked to ones disavdantage, it seems as though people are exploiting their "blackness" to avoid taking responsibility for their actions.
Model.
Mogul.
Good Samaritan.
Owner of a shoulder to cry on.
President of The Knowles De La Familia Fan Club.
Condescending double standard promoting bitch.
I love me some Tyra Banks, I really do- in fact Tyra Banks is one of the most important figures in the world because she shows that not all black women look and act the same and that for every ghetto finger pointing hoodrat competing for "love" on VH1 there is a proffesional well spoken lady proving that black is a shade not a lifestyle.
But I can't help but be mad at Tyra, I wish I could leave Tyra's pussy to be great, but I can't because then I'd be a hypocrite, I mock everyone else for promoting double standards and then try and turn a blind eye to Tyra who is guilty of most double standards.
Like Beyonce, Tyra often plays a game where she will "street it up" when she needs to appear down with the kids and appear to be more "stereotypically black." It's why Beyonce' will intentionally incorporate slang words into her vocab when appearing on 106&Park and its why Tyra Banks said "Kiss my fat BLACK ass."
What has you being black got to do with you not being able to control your weight?
Tyra Banks said "BLACK ass" because she was playing the race card, what she was actually saying was, "If you laugh at me because I look like a beached lace fronted whale you're actually laughing at black people because most of my fellow black mamas have curves, right?".
No Tyra- you only said black because it was the pussy way out.
You being black has got nothing to do with you putting on weight and I'm so fucking tired of black women being perceived as the "mamas".
That racial stereotype of the black woman being a"mama" comes from when the most maternal black women would be in charge of raising the white chi'ren on the mas'ers plantation, now it is exploited so all big black women in film and tv have to be maternal, warm, loving and smiling, "come here cha- mama's here now cha."
Tyra Banks also puts on her "mama" act when on ANTM, she is given the authority to yell and embarass girls because "when my mama shouts at me like this it's because she cares." Shut the fuck up- you were mad at Tiffany because she didn't cry when YOU kicked her off the show and since you get kicks out of watching other people cry it pissed you off that she didn't.
Tyra Banks for some reason is under the impression that she also has the right to act the mediator in situations that do not involve her, like when she had the bitches from Bad Girls Club on the show.
She has succesfully manipulated various racial stereotypes to present herself a scolding/loving mama when all she actually does is embarass them when they do not react in the way that she wants them to.
She is also guilty of double standards when she joked and laughed with Ray J about the sex tape even though he admitted that it was HIS idea but then gave Kim Kardashian a hard time about the same tape.
Aren't you always talking about female empowerment?
Vrai or Faux?
Tyra Banks did not realize that she was saying "its ok for a guy but not for a girl" when she grilled Kim about why and how she did the sex tape but then discussed penis sizes with Ray J.
Like I always say, if Tyra Banks is REALLY concerned with loose women why doesn't she get Alicia Keys on the show.
When it comes to Beyonce', her "mama" antics came to a head when she only decided to mention that her father had to be escorted to school when he was younger due to racism when she needed a reason to support Obama in the election. Although I'm sure Beyonce' cared very deeply about Obama's cause, she was not able to give a clear reason as to why she was supporting Obama.
"He's so intelligent" doesn't mean shit.
Hitler was intelligent.
Saddam Hussein was intelligent.
George Bush is int-
Mariah is another perpetrator, only announcing that her daddy was chacklet when it was deemed as being cool to be black with emergence of Boyz 2 Men and Aaliyah.
Now I am very aware of the importance of women like Beyonce' and Tyra Banks in pop culture as they prove alongside Naomi and Oprah that not all women of color come from the same background or have the same views or even share the same culture, but it is very annoying when negative racial stereotypes are used to enhance or "sweeten" their own personal image.
You may accuse me of black female bashing, but I think black people as a culture have come far enough without us all having to constantly compliment each other just in case mainstream media forgets to.
Yes Beyonce' is THE BEST FEMALE ENTERTAINER OF ALL TIME.
And Yes Tyra Banks existance is crucial to the image of black women in pop culture but until we stop expecting every single black women we see to be the comforting sweet mama or the ghetto uneducated slut we will forever be stuck in boxes.
When it comes to BET, they are a joke.
"This song is too pop".
To suggest that a song is "too pop" for BET only promotes the idea that the only genre of music black artists should be doing is "R'n'b," when we know for a fact that the majority of these "r'n'b" stars haven't released an "r'n'b" single a day in their fabricated careers. How would BET feel if MTV decided that Keisha Cole was too "r'n'b" for them, there would be an uproar.
Although there was once a time where being black worked to ones disavdantage, it seems as though people are exploiting their "blackness" to avoid taking responsibility for their actions.
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