http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2SOiztOcy4
Word?
Since we're on the issue of God, here is my take on the situation:
YOUR CHUNKY ASS IS SO FAT NOT EVEN GOD COULD LIFT YOUR SPIRITS.
Man- I wish stores would stop making clothes in XL so that fat motherfuckers like this would be forced to get their asses into a gym instead of talking about shit that nobody wants to hear. You look like a Baboon with a tan.
Your fat has surrounded your brain so much that you can't help but to say stupid shit like
"This is not meant to offend the Beyonce' fans but the Beyonce' fanatics".
What the fuck is the word Fan short for?
Beyonce'?
Beyonce'?
You want to talk shit about Beyonce' you fucking Rasputian.
You want to talk shit about Beyonce' with your scary ass.
You want to talk shit about Beyonce' when your entire body is taking up the entire screen so much so that I can barely fit you into my vision.
Nappy headed Burger King stanning- Krispy Kreme licking- heart condition awaiting fatso.
NOBODY talks shit about Beyonce'.
You make Sean Kingston look like a catwalk model.
The day you decided to remove that camera from underneath your tits and film that video was the day you will forever be hunted by The Pop Whore and Associates, we will find you on Twitter and leave witty and hurtful comments about your ashy skin, we will alert Brian_Bee and Gavin and they will deal with your 65.7 waist.
I'm suprised you hate Beyonce'- after all her initials are KFC.
As you can see adding comments have been disabled for that video because we KFC Representatives did our jobs, and we will continue to hunt you down and remind you of what you look like until you apologise because we don't fuck about. Beyonce' knows we don't fuck about- Solange knows we don't fuck about. Keri Hilson knows we don't fuck about.
We don't care who or what you are- if you get at our Queen your ass is over.
Why are Beyonce' haters either ugly on in the inside or on the outside- Etta James counts for both. Why doesn't Beyonce' have any well rounded haters who can put a clear argument together, instead we have shits like you to deal with.
You better hope that I'm not in contact with anybody who works in your local Wendy's because If I am, I will have that bitch lace your Full Fat Double Cream Chocolate Covered Strawberry Apple Pie La Mode with laxative, so your mouth won't be the only thing that'll be running.
You are officially on our list, right after Sandra Rose and if we can destroy the "careers" of people who actually have lives then breaking you down won't be difficult at all.
Why do you think Pride Magazine tried to clear up that Nia Long mess- because I THE POP WHORE SENT IN A LETTER.
Why do you think Amerie, Ashanti or anybody else who makes random and regular appearances on 106 and Park are flops- because whenever they have an album out we The KFC Representatives remind their fans of how useless and irrelevant they are- their fans spend all their time trying to counteract forgetting to buy their albums, whilst at the same time we're pre-ordering copies of a Beyonce' album that she hasn't even recorded yet.
You wanted to talk shit about our Queen.
Now you shall feel our wrath.
For anybody looking for that oompa loompa on twitter, just type in BigZo20 in the Find People tab.
Sunday, 9 August 2009
Saturday, 8 August 2009
Our Lady Of Creole Supremacy
Hello Chil'ren
Welcome to the first service of Our Lady of Creole Supremacy. We are currently taking over for the PopWhore because she was recently kidnapped by Sandra Rose and Tina Davis because of those smart ass comments she made about them- we do not expect to hear or see The PopWhore anytime soon (unless you're on Twitter- but then ignore her because it's actually Sandra Rose to speaking to you and unless you want her to send a virus to your computer of the likes of which you have never seen by simply Tweeting you ignore the PopWhore, Ignore the PopWhore)
Our Lady of Creole Supremacy is an E-Church and we aim to spread the good word of Sister Fierce to the masses through the internet, we believe in good family values (bye bye Alicia) and commercialisation (Hello Mathew). Below is an extract from The Creole Verse.
Dereon Chapter 6 Verse 2:
And Celestine sayeth unto Solange "If thou refuses to wear the glitter bikini i hast made for you- thou shall be forced to enter the WigCrypt and taketh out the knots from Sister Fierce's I lacefront."
Solange replieth, "Suck on a lemon bitch- you favoureth The Wigged One more than thou favoureth me, I shall leaveth this shit(-eth) and find my own wayeth in the world OUTSIDE of Houston."
So Solange lifteth her bag and left The Creole Supremacy Mansion and foundeth herself at a burning bush, she sayeth "What the fuck".
And then she heard a voice, Solange asketh "Who is Thou"
The voice respondeth:
I AM THE GOD OF THY FATHER
I AM THE GOD OF THY MOTHER
I AM SASHA FIERCE.
Welcome to the first service of Our Lady of Creole Supremacy. We are currently taking over for the PopWhore because she was recently kidnapped by Sandra Rose and Tina Davis because of those smart ass comments she made about them- we do not expect to hear or see The PopWhore anytime soon (unless you're on Twitter- but then ignore her because it's actually Sandra Rose to speaking to you and unless you want her to send a virus to your computer of the likes of which you have never seen by simply Tweeting you ignore the PopWhore, Ignore the PopWhore)
Our Lady of Creole Supremacy is an E-Church and we aim to spread the good word of Sister Fierce to the masses through the internet, we believe in good family values (bye bye Alicia) and commercialisation (Hello Mathew). Below is an extract from The Creole Verse.
Dereon Chapter 6 Verse 2:
And Celestine sayeth unto Solange "If thou refuses to wear the glitter bikini i hast made for you- thou shall be forced to enter the WigCrypt and taketh out the knots from Sister Fierce's I lacefront."
Solange replieth, "Suck on a lemon bitch- you favoureth The Wigged One more than thou favoureth me, I shall leaveth this shit(-eth) and find my own wayeth in the world OUTSIDE of Houston."
So Solange lifteth her bag and left The Creole Supremacy Mansion and foundeth herself at a burning bush, she sayeth "What the fuck".
And then she heard a voice, Solange asketh "Who is Thou"
The voice respondeth:
I AM THE GOD OF THY FATHER
I AM THE GOD OF THY MOTHER
I AM SASHA FIERCE.
Thursday, 6 August 2009
HoNesia
Definition: When a man or woman behaves in a slutty and dirty way and then acts as though it never happened and then calls people out for reminding them they were at one point a hoe. Example: "Girl- Don't try ac' like you HoNesia on the ass- you know you fucked Raquan."
HoNesia usually occurs when the person who was once a hoe regrets what they did in the past and decide that because they want to protect themselves from being called a hoe they must diss the people who told everyone they were a hoe in the first place.
Sufferers of HoNesia (according to a survey carried out on http://www.pussylips.com/) do not realise that insulting the people who know the truth about their skankgame only results in more stuff being exposed.
Robyn Givens, the current President of HGP (HoGamePrecise) explained, "When you're a hoe you do stuff which you later regret when you finally convince some dumb needle dicked dude to marry you- so the best thing to do is to deny it- not to confront the person who exposed you because they'll only expose you some more- like putting voice messages you left to them in a song, or recounting the time they ejaculated prematurely on your stomach."
She added, "If you're a hoe that really and truly is your business- it has nothing to do with anybody else if you decide to let your Priest put one in the pink and another in the stink, because it is YOUR body, but when you mature and you change and realise your mistake, do not reply to anybody who exposed you, simply shame them by being succesful and being a better person than you were when they were dumping in your mouth."
Below are things to do if you used to be a hoe or you are currently a hoe and trying to change your public image:
1. Delete your Twitter, FaceBook, GayDar, LesLine, CuntConnect or whatever the kids are using nowadays- the less people know about you the less they can say about you.
2. Educate Yourself. Anybody who is spending all their time talking about what you were supposed to have done really hasn't got much going on in their own life and so educate yourself so you can work yourself out of that negative environment. Although it may seem like the entire world thinks you're a hoe, if you have something else to be known for like being the girl who's amazing at running track or being the guy who's an amazing lyricist then you complicate your identity for your haters because they then will be forced to realise that what they say about you means nothing to you.
3. Avoid parties where you know people who think you're a hoe are going to be. It's better to be sat at home drinking shots with your Uncle Rosalinda where you know you're safe than to put yourself into an environment where your saftey and feelings are at risk. You know how ignorant people can be, for example if you're lips were a little dry and you decided to lick them- "Oh nigga look! Bitch is licking her lips cos she want you to plant some seeds in her mout'".
4. Don't do this :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjeRk_GxcqM because then people will support this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnFT42EucEs and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jf67T6YbvBs
and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzHnNPLWsDQ
Ps.
If you're a hoe that's been fucking for beats but still has not received the beats, then get another career. (How You Dewin Cassie)
HoNesia usually occurs when the person who was once a hoe regrets what they did in the past and decide that because they want to protect themselves from being called a hoe they must diss the people who told everyone they were a hoe in the first place.
Sufferers of HoNesia (according to a survey carried out on http://www.pussylips.com/) do not realise that insulting the people who know the truth about their skankgame only results in more stuff being exposed.
Robyn Givens, the current President of HGP (HoGamePrecise) explained, "When you're a hoe you do stuff which you later regret when you finally convince some dumb needle dicked dude to marry you- so the best thing to do is to deny it- not to confront the person who exposed you because they'll only expose you some more- like putting voice messages you left to them in a song, or recounting the time they ejaculated prematurely on your stomach."
She added, "If you're a hoe that really and truly is your business- it has nothing to do with anybody else if you decide to let your Priest put one in the pink and another in the stink, because it is YOUR body, but when you mature and you change and realise your mistake, do not reply to anybody who exposed you, simply shame them by being succesful and being a better person than you were when they were dumping in your mouth."
Below are things to do if you used to be a hoe or you are currently a hoe and trying to change your public image:
1. Delete your Twitter, FaceBook, GayDar, LesLine, CuntConnect or whatever the kids are using nowadays- the less people know about you the less they can say about you.
2. Educate Yourself. Anybody who is spending all their time talking about what you were supposed to have done really hasn't got much going on in their own life and so educate yourself so you can work yourself out of that negative environment. Although it may seem like the entire world thinks you're a hoe, if you have something else to be known for like being the girl who's amazing at running track or being the guy who's an amazing lyricist then you complicate your identity for your haters because they then will be forced to realise that what they say about you means nothing to you.
3. Avoid parties where you know people who think you're a hoe are going to be. It's better to be sat at home drinking shots with your Uncle Rosalinda where you know you're safe than to put yourself into an environment where your saftey and feelings are at risk. You know how ignorant people can be, for example if you're lips were a little dry and you decided to lick them- "Oh nigga look! Bitch is licking her lips cos she want you to plant some seeds in her mout'".
4. Don't do this :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjeRk_GxcqM because then people will support this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WnFT42EucEs and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jf67T6YbvBs
and this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzHnNPLWsDQ
Ps.
If you're a hoe that's been fucking for beats but still has not received the beats, then get another career. (How You Dewin Cassie)
Wednesday, 5 August 2009
All That's Fab
There are some people who lie to themselves.
There are some people who convince themselves, with the help of you a few tweeters, that they are Icons.
So I'm going to tell you what I think:
You haven't been relevant since before Mary Kate and Ashley started their periods.
Your album is going to go Double Polystyrene and you will be dropped from your label within the next to years.
You're a flop.
Fabolous- be realistic, are you suprised that nobody wants you on the cover of their magazne, like seriously- when was the last time you wanted to read an article about somebody who YOU didn't care about.
Update:
Loso's Way shifted 98,000 units (I told you i was being generous).
I can't say I'm surprised- after all- anybody with a recording contract who spends all day on Twitter shouldn't be taken seriously.
Now you may call me a hater and say I don't matter and say that it's the fans that matter, but like your haters, your fans didn't buy your record meaning that your fans and haters are of equal relevance and importance to you.
All that's going to happen now is that labels are going to stop signing artists like T.I, Fab etc and start signing more visual and experimental artists like Kanye West and dare I say 50 cent, after all they are the only ones who actually sell any records.
The black sub culture has a habit of not putting their money where their mouths are. They will complain about the state of modern rap and claim Soulja Boy is to blame but then won't buy the records of artists who actually make quality music.
Whilst Soulja Boy and Bow Wow deserve to flop (as they continue to do) artists such as Fabolous and The Game deserve to shift more units than they do.
If you want to see what I predicted Fab would sell just look below:
Like Ashanti and Jennifer Hudson etc, your fans will support you with their mouths and will diss anybody or thing that comments negatively about your shortcomings as a commercial artist but when it comes to actually buying what you put out- nada. You won't get shit from them.
This is why I can't wait till HDD post your first week sales, then I can laugh at you for believing you were bigger than what you actually are.
You can call me a hater if you want- but who wants to place bets.
I bet that Loso's Way sells less than 190,000 units in first week and then less than 80,000 units in second week. (I'm even being a little generous here) If i'm wrong, I will dedicate an entire week to promoting, complimenting and asslicking the record on this blog and on Twitter, If i'm right (winks) then I don't want anything.
I shouldn't have to be rewarded for my greatness.
There are some people who convince themselves, with the help of you a few tweeters, that they are Icons.
So I'm going to tell you what I think:
You haven't been relevant since before Mary Kate and Ashley started their periods.
Your album is going to go Double Polystyrene and you will be dropped from your label within the next to years.
You're a flop.
Fabolous- be realistic, are you suprised that nobody wants you on the cover of their magazne, like seriously- when was the last time you wanted to read an article about somebody who YOU didn't care about.
Update:
Loso's Way shifted 98,000 units (I told you i was being generous).
I can't say I'm surprised- after all- anybody with a recording contract who spends all day on Twitter shouldn't be taken seriously.
Now you may call me a hater and say I don't matter and say that it's the fans that matter, but like your haters, your fans didn't buy your record meaning that your fans and haters are of equal relevance and importance to you.
All that's going to happen now is that labels are going to stop signing artists like T.I, Fab etc and start signing more visual and experimental artists like Kanye West and dare I say 50 cent, after all they are the only ones who actually sell any records.
The black sub culture has a habit of not putting their money where their mouths are. They will complain about the state of modern rap and claim Soulja Boy is to blame but then won't buy the records of artists who actually make quality music.
Whilst Soulja Boy and Bow Wow deserve to flop (as they continue to do) artists such as Fabolous and The Game deserve to shift more units than they do.
If you want to see what I predicted Fab would sell just look below:
Like Ashanti and Jennifer Hudson etc, your fans will support you with their mouths and will diss anybody or thing that comments negatively about your shortcomings as a commercial artist but when it comes to actually buying what you put out- nada. You won't get shit from them.
This is why I can't wait till HDD post your first week sales, then I can laugh at you for believing you were bigger than what you actually are.
You can call me a hater if you want- but who wants to place bets.
I bet that Loso's Way sells less than 190,000 units in first week and then less than 80,000 units in second week. (I'm even being a little generous here) If i'm wrong, I will dedicate an entire week to promoting, complimenting and asslicking the record on this blog and on Twitter, If i'm right (winks) then I don't want anything.
I shouldn't have to be rewarded for my greatness.
Tuesday, 4 August 2009
Barbadose Instinct
We got talking to Pop Superstar Rihanna about a movie which she is both starring in and producing titled Barbadose Instinct.
PopWhore: Hello.
Rihanna: Ello.
PopWhore: So tell us about your movie, Barbadose Instinct.
Rihanna: Well de movie is about a gyal like me who kill all de mudderfuckers who ever hurt her in da past.
PopWhore: So it's a violent movie then?
Rihanna: Oh yes- dis movie is going de show all dem fuckers who da real bad bitch is- believe dat- believe dat- me gon kill all de chichi man pon de place.
PopWhore: ChiChi Man?
Rihanna: Yeah you know- all de batty boys- all dem pussy o' faggots, me gon kill dem all in de movie.
PopWhore: So the movie has homophobic undertones?
Rihanna: What's that word? Home-Phobic, why me gone be afraid of me own home- tarass!
PopWhore: How have you been preparing for the role?
Rihanna: When I'm not out and about getting my photo taken on de streets, I watch lats and lats of movies about women who kill MOTHERFUCKING BUMBERKLUTS who beat on women.
PopWhore: Have you spoken to Chris since the incident?
Rihanna: That likkle fucker been belling of me line, but me never gon forgive him, he gave me a HIYAH! and and HAYOGEN! and then a UPPERCUT! He jus' lucky me had my seatbelt on, oddawise I would have run a blade chru his likkle chichi boy ass.
PopWhore: And has Beyonce' reached out to you.
Rihanna: Who dat?
PopWhore: Beyonce'.
Rihanna: You mean dat likkle bi-atch who had her nephew call me up and chreaten to stick a rattle in my cooch- oh hell no dat bitch ain't called- but Mellisa said she saw her sister at a club and she was makin' jokes about me- she nah know who she messin' wit- I'll fuck her up, her mother AND her cousin too. Don't tes' me.
PopWhore: Are you seeing anybody at the moment?
Rihanna: Yes me vision is very clear.
PopWhore: No no, as in sexually.
Rihanna: Oh yes- me is. Ya wan me to lis' dem.
PopWhore: Ok.
Rihanna:
Jermaine Jackson
Randy Jackson
Joe Jackson
Chris Brown (but dont tell de feds)
Bobby Brown
Drake
My middle finger
Jay Z
Marilyn Ma-
PopWhore: Sorry?
Rihanna: Marilyn Manson.
PopWhore: No before that.
Rihanna: Who Jey Zay? Oh girl don' act suprised. You know he been spicin' up my curried goat since de day I got my GreenCard. He nah love dat wife of his- she never home to cook for him- she too busy singing on beat and achieving shit- me would be a much better wife- foreign pussy is de best kind.
PopWhore: I see.
Rihanna: Anways- I've got to go to de clinic for my test results. I hope me do well, me wasnt very academic backhome
PopWhore: I don't think its that kind of test.
Rihanna: I'll see you around.
PopWhore: Hello.
Rihanna: Ello.
PopWhore: So tell us about your movie, Barbadose Instinct.
Rihanna: Well de movie is about a gyal like me who kill all de mudderfuckers who ever hurt her in da past.
PopWhore: So it's a violent movie then?
Rihanna: Oh yes- dis movie is going de show all dem fuckers who da real bad bitch is- believe dat- believe dat- me gon kill all de chichi man pon de place.
PopWhore: ChiChi Man?
Rihanna: Yeah you know- all de batty boys- all dem pussy o' faggots, me gon kill dem all in de movie.
PopWhore: So the movie has homophobic undertones?
Rihanna: What's that word? Home-Phobic, why me gone be afraid of me own home- tarass!
PopWhore: How have you been preparing for the role?
Rihanna: When I'm not out and about getting my photo taken on de streets, I watch lats and lats of movies about women who kill MOTHERFUCKING BUMBERKLUTS who beat on women.
PopWhore: Have you spoken to Chris since the incident?
Rihanna: That likkle fucker been belling of me line, but me never gon forgive him, he gave me a HIYAH! and and HAYOGEN! and then a UPPERCUT! He jus' lucky me had my seatbelt on, oddawise I would have run a blade chru his likkle chichi boy ass.
PopWhore: And has Beyonce' reached out to you.
Rihanna: Who dat?
PopWhore: Beyonce'.
Rihanna: You mean dat likkle bi-atch who had her nephew call me up and chreaten to stick a rattle in my cooch- oh hell no dat bitch ain't called- but Mellisa said she saw her sister at a club and she was makin' jokes about me- she nah know who she messin' wit- I'll fuck her up, her mother AND her cousin too. Don't tes' me.
PopWhore: Are you seeing anybody at the moment?
Rihanna: Yes me vision is very clear.
PopWhore: No no, as in sexually.
Rihanna: Oh yes- me is. Ya wan me to lis' dem.
PopWhore: Ok.
Rihanna:
Jermaine Jackson
Randy Jackson
Joe Jackson
Chris Brown (but dont tell de feds)
Bobby Brown
Drake
My middle finger
Jay Z
Marilyn Ma-
PopWhore: Sorry?
Rihanna: Marilyn Manson.
PopWhore: No before that.
Rihanna: Who Jey Zay? Oh girl don' act suprised. You know he been spicin' up my curried goat since de day I got my GreenCard. He nah love dat wife of his- she never home to cook for him- she too busy singing on beat and achieving shit- me would be a much better wife- foreign pussy is de best kind.
PopWhore: I see.
Rihanna: Anways- I've got to go to de clinic for my test results. I hope me do well, me wasnt very academic backhome
PopWhore: I don't think its that kind of test.
Rihanna: I'll see you around.
And what exactly is it that you are promoting.
In today's pop culture- there seems to be an obsession and interest in people who are famous for nothing and there's nothing wrong with that because there must be something interesting about these famous for nothing people that generates an interest in them.
However, these famous for nothing people should be aware that being famous for nothing comes with a price- as soon as you say something that pisses people off, people will start to say "Hold on a minute- what is this bitch actually famous for."
The Beckhams.
He was a British Sporting hero and she was a fifth of the world's most succesfully untalented group in Pop Culture history, now he's a Pop Icon and she's his wife.
She stages photo oppurtunities, attends events, is on the cover of magazines and then you begin to wonder- what is she actually promoting.
She is noted for her beauty so any cosmetic or fragrance endorsements she obtains are because of her name and not her face.
She is noted for (God help me) talent and so her part in the Spice Girls was merely "eye candy" but then if she's not that pretty than "eye candy" isn't the right phrase to use and Victoria Beckham is the sort of woman who is only beautiful in comparison to someone uglier.
This is why the Beckhams are leaving LA.
For years they tried to become part of US Culture and they finally suceeded using David's career is an excuse but here are the reasons that went wrong:
1. That fake one part show Victoria did really did her no favours, instead of showing who she really is as a person she simply was playing a caricature of herself, almost intentionally parodying the public's opinion of her- it didn't help that the "assistant" she hired to help her was actually an actress.
2. Because football is such a niche sport here in the US, the people that take it seriously take it VERY seriously, in the Uk because it is THE major sport many of the biggest players are also the biggest celebrities meaning that the Uk is used to seeing their favourite football player on the cover of GQ as well as on the pitch but because in the US, soccer really is ALL about soccer, the fans of LA Galaxy did not appreciate that Beckham was only using the team to turn he and his wife into US stars and to capitalise on US endorsements, which is why he was booed.
3. Victoria just isn't hot. If Victoria Beckham was sexually attractive she could have capitalised on becoming the "ultimate wife" in the way that Jennifer Lopez has become to Mark Anthony. People love to desire what they know they will never have, which is why Ashanti is still in the recording studio, and so if Victoria was sexy, she could have appealed to men who loved and respected her husband and appealed to women who would have respected her for bagging such a hottie.
Also, imagine what it would be like for Victoria to be sat in a room with Jada Pinkett Smith, Angelina Jolie and Tom Cruise's pet knowing that she can never match their beauty and world renowned respect for being succesful women in their own right. She may have been in the SpiceGirls but like the other four has not been able to use this to their advantage because if they had they would all be pop icons individually but the most famous Spice Girl is actually only relevant because she is the wife of a Pop Icon.
It's sort of like if Keri Hilson went to her home town, she'd be respected and adored and treated as the HBIC but the second she steps into HollyWood she isn't even in The Top 100 list of recognisable and respected women.
Which is why Victoria belongs in the UK where she can really reign supreme because like i said before she is only a hot bitch in comparison to someone who is not a hot bitch.
I think that's all.
Oh yes- somebody asked me to comment on Britney's Radar video so here I go:
The old Britney would not have settled with a video like this for such an upbeat and amazing song, but that doesn't change the fact that Britney changed and is still changing Pop Culture and is still selling out shows and records. Britney hasn't promoted a record in years yet she outsold girls who spent breakfast, lunch and dinner on the couch of some talk show host promoting their goodies.
I'd also like to congratulate Beyonce' for having the Number 1 tour in the country even before the tour is actually over and I'd like to also beg everyone to listen to Michelle William's Unexpected record on Youtube.
The record puts Michelle's personal and artistic growth into Euro-Pop music and like Solange proves that sales don't mean anything when you achieve artistic credibility
However, these famous for nothing people should be aware that being famous for nothing comes with a price- as soon as you say something that pisses people off, people will start to say "Hold on a minute- what is this bitch actually famous for."
The Beckhams.
He was a British Sporting hero and she was a fifth of the world's most succesfully untalented group in Pop Culture history, now he's a Pop Icon and she's his wife.
She stages photo oppurtunities, attends events, is on the cover of magazines and then you begin to wonder- what is she actually promoting.
She is noted for her beauty so any cosmetic or fragrance endorsements she obtains are because of her name and not her face.
She is noted for (God help me) talent and so her part in the Spice Girls was merely "eye candy" but then if she's not that pretty than "eye candy" isn't the right phrase to use and Victoria Beckham is the sort of woman who is only beautiful in comparison to someone uglier.
This is why the Beckhams are leaving LA.
For years they tried to become part of US Culture and they finally suceeded using David's career is an excuse but here are the reasons that went wrong:
1. That fake one part show Victoria did really did her no favours, instead of showing who she really is as a person she simply was playing a caricature of herself, almost intentionally parodying the public's opinion of her- it didn't help that the "assistant" she hired to help her was actually an actress.
2. Because football is such a niche sport here in the US, the people that take it seriously take it VERY seriously, in the Uk because it is THE major sport many of the biggest players are also the biggest celebrities meaning that the Uk is used to seeing their favourite football player on the cover of GQ as well as on the pitch but because in the US, soccer really is ALL about soccer, the fans of LA Galaxy did not appreciate that Beckham was only using the team to turn he and his wife into US stars and to capitalise on US endorsements, which is why he was booed.
3. Victoria just isn't hot. If Victoria Beckham was sexually attractive she could have capitalised on becoming the "ultimate wife" in the way that Jennifer Lopez has become to Mark Anthony. People love to desire what they know they will never have, which is why Ashanti is still in the recording studio, and so if Victoria was sexy, she could have appealed to men who loved and respected her husband and appealed to women who would have respected her for bagging such a hottie.
Also, imagine what it would be like for Victoria to be sat in a room with Jada Pinkett Smith, Angelina Jolie and Tom Cruise's pet knowing that she can never match their beauty and world renowned respect for being succesful women in their own right. She may have been in the SpiceGirls but like the other four has not been able to use this to their advantage because if they had they would all be pop icons individually but the most famous Spice Girl is actually only relevant because she is the wife of a Pop Icon.
It's sort of like if Keri Hilson went to her home town, she'd be respected and adored and treated as the HBIC but the second she steps into HollyWood she isn't even in The Top 100 list of recognisable and respected women.
Which is why Victoria belongs in the UK where she can really reign supreme because like i said before she is only a hot bitch in comparison to someone who is not a hot bitch.
I think that's all.
Oh yes- somebody asked me to comment on Britney's Radar video so here I go:
The old Britney would not have settled with a video like this for such an upbeat and amazing song, but that doesn't change the fact that Britney changed and is still changing Pop Culture and is still selling out shows and records. Britney hasn't promoted a record in years yet she outsold girls who spent breakfast, lunch and dinner on the couch of some talk show host promoting their goodies.
I'd also like to congratulate Beyonce' for having the Number 1 tour in the country even before the tour is actually over and I'd like to also beg everyone to listen to Michelle William's Unexpected record on Youtube.
The record puts Michelle's personal and artistic growth into Euro-Pop music and like Solange proves that sales don't mean anything when you achieve artistic credibility
Monday, 3 August 2009
Keeping It Real
"The problem with modern society is that people tend to hate and judge someone without even considering the facts. We form our opinion based on lies and judgments from things we hear. That, is the problem with modern society."
Word?
That's the problem with our society?
No my dear, the problem with the BLACK pop culture is that when it suits us we can overlook certain things, we can defend OJ when know he damn well killed that white lady, we can defend Michael when we know that if our neighbour was accused of the same shit- we'd pitchfork that dude to the ground and we find a way to rationalise discrimination against fairer skinned people because they "they tink dey better dan us".
You won't tell me what the problem is with society on MY blog, so you can keep your conclusion because my dear, nobody comes on this blog and tries to correct me, I reserve that shit for Twitter.
Since you're so big on considering facts, here are some of mine:
1. As a Beyonce' fan I can tell you from the bottom of my spiced heart that I do not envy the fan base of ANY other artist dead or alive, why?
Michael Jacksons fans are deluded.
Ciara's fans are non existant
Rihanna's fans think innovation means cutting your hair and dying it black.
Janet fans still live in 1993
Aretha Franklin fans are deceased and Whitney Houston fans still think Bobby is completely to blame for Whitney being hooked on Le Craque.
To suggest that my comments on Ms.Keys were fuelled by a "jealousy" I have of her is a joke because there are better women than Alicia who couldn't match Beyonce' and that's a fact.
And to tell me that I can't tell you that Beyonce' is by far a better singer and all round entertainer because that is a matter of opinion is stupid because whether it is YOUR opinion that Sean Kingston is not overweight it doesn't change the fact that he is morbildy gargantuan. A Fact is a Fact.
This is an opinion "Alicia's music is deeper than Sasha's."
This is a fact "If you put Beyonce', Alicia, Mary J and Mariah on the same tour and asked the audience which artist entertained them the most, the answer would be Beyonce'."
You don't have to like an artist to know that they are talented. In the same way I don't have to know Alicia to know that she is husband snatching cum swallowing trollop.Mmmkay.
When it comes to it, if Mashonda is saying that she believed she and her husband were happily married around the time she discovered the affair, then the marriage still existed. Alicia had an affair- accept it, lick it, stick it in your backside and call it Papa Bear.
And when it comes to Beyonce, I'm aware that she can indeed be "fake". I'm aware that she was being "fake" when she told Larry King that she believed a certain employee of her husband's was "talented." But I'm also aware that Beyonce' has gotten to where she's gotten by keeping it all about her art and talent, which is you don't hear anybody accusing HER of borrowing husbands.
And when it comes to Beyonce' falling down the stairs:
You're right, no other artist would have fallen down a flight of stairs because no other artist can perform like Beyonce' does, your favourite artists are too busy either sitting on a stool, sitting behind a piano or sitting on Diddy's lap to put on a quality show.
If you really want to discuss this, we can get IM up in this bitch:
www.twitter.com/popslutwhore
To Alicia Key's Publicist:
This is the last time I will bash your client and remind people of what a loose whore she is, so you don't have to worry about sending me that cheque.
Word?
That's the problem with our society?
No my dear, the problem with the BLACK pop culture is that when it suits us we can overlook certain things, we can defend OJ when know he damn well killed that white lady, we can defend Michael when we know that if our neighbour was accused of the same shit- we'd pitchfork that dude to the ground and we find a way to rationalise discrimination against fairer skinned people because they "they tink dey better dan us".
You won't tell me what the problem is with society on MY blog, so you can keep your conclusion because my dear, nobody comes on this blog and tries to correct me, I reserve that shit for Twitter.
Since you're so big on considering facts, here are some of mine:
1. As a Beyonce' fan I can tell you from the bottom of my spiced heart that I do not envy the fan base of ANY other artist dead or alive, why?
Michael Jacksons fans are deluded.
Ciara's fans are non existant
Rihanna's fans think innovation means cutting your hair and dying it black.
Janet fans still live in 1993
Aretha Franklin fans are deceased and Whitney Houston fans still think Bobby is completely to blame for Whitney being hooked on Le Craque.
To suggest that my comments on Ms.Keys were fuelled by a "jealousy" I have of her is a joke because there are better women than Alicia who couldn't match Beyonce' and that's a fact.
And to tell me that I can't tell you that Beyonce' is by far a better singer and all round entertainer because that is a matter of opinion is stupid because whether it is YOUR opinion that Sean Kingston is not overweight it doesn't change the fact that he is morbildy gargantuan. A Fact is a Fact.
This is an opinion "Alicia's music is deeper than Sasha's."
This is a fact "If you put Beyonce', Alicia, Mary J and Mariah on the same tour and asked the audience which artist entertained them the most, the answer would be Beyonce'."
You don't have to like an artist to know that they are talented. In the same way I don't have to know Alicia to know that she is husband snatching cum swallowing trollop.Mmmkay.
When it comes to it, if Mashonda is saying that she believed she and her husband were happily married around the time she discovered the affair, then the marriage still existed. Alicia had an affair- accept it, lick it, stick it in your backside and call it Papa Bear.
And when it comes to Beyonce, I'm aware that she can indeed be "fake". I'm aware that she was being "fake" when she told Larry King that she believed a certain employee of her husband's was "talented." But I'm also aware that Beyonce' has gotten to where she's gotten by keeping it all about her art and talent, which is you don't hear anybody accusing HER of borrowing husbands.
And when it comes to Beyonce' falling down the stairs:
You're right, no other artist would have fallen down a flight of stairs because no other artist can perform like Beyonce' does, your favourite artists are too busy either sitting on a stool, sitting behind a piano or sitting on Diddy's lap to put on a quality show.
If you really want to discuss this, we can get IM up in this bitch:
www.twitter.com/popslutwhore
To Alicia Key's Publicist:
This is the last time I will bash your client and remind people of what a loose whore she is, so you don't have to worry about sending me that cheque.
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