Sometimes when I'm alone in my apartement I find myself having debates with myself. The other night myself and I debated whether people with multiple personalities should be sectioned and institutionalised and myself and I resolved the debate by simply putting on 106 and Park and watching Terrence and Rocsi pretend to like the shit they interview. Then I saw Nicki Minaj.
Now I tried for some time to avoid the hype surrounding her and then I realized something- people like me are always dogging on people like Ciara and Kelly Rowland for not being good enough or not trying hard enough to "put their name" out there and so it was hypcrotical for me NOT to give this Minaj character a look and a listen.
So I Youtubed her and watched a couple of interviews and came to a conclusion which my dear friends at the WigCrypt had come to many years ago.
In this world if YOU want something YOU need to get up and GO get IT.
I realized whilst studying Minaj that this bitch has DEFINED WHO SHE IS. I'm sure there are 100s of bitches on Twitter who can spit harder than Alicia after sucking the tip of that married man's love pistol but there's a reason it's Nicky Minaj whose on everyone's lips. When I began to understand her purpose,I understood how phenomenal she actually is. Here is a black girl from Brooklyn referencing Japanese street fashion and forcing a culture which is ignorant to anything which doesn't sag low to pay attention.
THAT's how you get people's attention.
You dont say "Im not getting anywhere cos im dark skin" or "if i was slimmer i'd be where Beyonce' is," get up and do something about it. If you want to prove that dark skin is just as beautiful as light skin then you need to come up with a gimmic to exploit that. Too many people use stereotypes when it suits them and get mad when stereotypes do not work to their advantage.
"Black Girls have bigger butts than girls from all other races." Correct.
"Black Girls are rude, obnoxious and hate on white girls." FUCK YOU MEAN.
If you allow yourself to be grouped into stereotypical segmentations, do not be suprised when those stereotypes work to your disadvantage.
"Are you sure you want to hire the black girl- she looked pretty rude."
"Are you sure you want to give the blonde the mangerial positition- she probably sucked, fucked and timmytucked her way to this company- let the man have it."
The reason I am doing this post is because I have a lot of debates regarding the media's unfair portrayal of black women in society.
It seems to me that what black means to the Media isn't what black means to black people. As much as I love the variations that black people have, European Creole, African, African American, Coolie it seems to me that the only representation that is perceived to be beautiful is this one:
http://static.gossipgirlinsider.com/images/gallery/tyra-banks.jpg
Tyra Banks isn't any less blacker because her "hair" is fair and her eyes are green but what's a chocolate skinned mami to do when she feels that her beauty will never be respected. What's she to do when the world won't call her beautiful like they do to her fairer counterparts.
Stop wanting to be called beautiful.
Stop expecting your beauty to be respected.
Acknowledge on your beauty, acknowledge your own skin color and acknowledge your own hair type because this is the body God gave you and it's the body you are going to die with. You can put plastic in your nose but itll biodegrade in the grave and you can put relaxer in your but that won't make it rain-proof.
Bitches who acknowledge their beauty get further because they know that looks can only get you so far.
For example:
http://iwantmysexyback.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/ciara1.jpg
http://popdynamite.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/lady-gaga-ugly.jpg
If being conventionally beautiful was the answer to everything then Princess Super C wouldn't be handing in her resumee at Sears right now. It's the weird looking bitch whose an icon one year after debutin and it's the weird looking bitch that everyone respects because that weird looking bitch knows what she's about and defined her own beauty instead of depending on Janet Jackson and Aaliyah to do it for her.
That's why I officially fucks with this Minaj character- instead of doing what Lil Kim and Foxxy did, she is going to do with what Nicki Minaj needs to do to make sure she's the one that we're all talking about and respect. That's how you get your name out there- it's how you promote yourself and it's how you make sure that even after 12 years of being signed people don't have a reason to respect anything you've done in your OWN right:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoJSnuyrj8w&feature=video_response
Monday, 14 December 2009
Monday, 7 December 2009
Grrrr Baby Grrrrr
Since my little vacation to an Island in the sun, I haven't had time to blog- yes call me whatchu want I have time to tweet but no time to blog, sue me.
However, this incident was making spirits do all kinds of dips, flips and samurai kicks when I heard about it.
To begin with I'd like to say that violence is not gender specific, a woman beating a man is just as bad as a man beating a woman, although the outcome will always be different its just as bad.
However.
When I heard that Tiger Wood's wife may have gone Glenn Close on his ass for dickdowning some other bitches I just had to applaud and called on the spirit of Pepper Labeija to send me a hiss so wicked that even Neyo would have to step back.
When someone gets married-that person dedicates their entire being and existance to that person, they dedicate their time to that person and share aspects of their soul with that person which may be very hard to.
So when that person betrays you by fucking ANOTHER woman and THEN comes home and eats YOUR cooking and then uses YOUR pussy after he's already had some OTHER pussy I believe this causes for some Celestininity.
Celestininity is the art of making a motherfucker pay for a wrong they have commited by making life as difficult as possible for them http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PmV_vsYgPI
Only when that person is truly sorry must the Celestiniasation of that person end. The art of Celestininity is not to get your ass in trouble whilst getting your revenge, this is why Tiger Woods wife isn't all that smart.
You see, when fucking with a rich dude you must learn that the only mouth that speaks is money- hit that motherfucker where it hurts- his account!
What that hoe should have done is told that cheating scoundrel "Looky here- you done cheated on me- you better find a way to cancel our prenuptial agreement OR I will take the kids and drag your name so low even Cassie will start sucking on it."
From Tiger Woods leaked calls to one of his side pieces it is evident that his pussy stinks more than Precious' on a summers day and so the idea of losing his wife and kids would scare him shitless. He would have no choice but to comply http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8doUht3SEM , fucking bastard.
What she shouldnt have done is beat his car with one of his own clubs because that's just rude. What she should have done is hit him with a baseball bat and say "You think I don't know how to play for the other team?".
And when it comes to those cum guzzling, scandalous ass, dick inhaling, anal friendly pussy leasing stretch marked mouthed harlots who want to fuck with a married man- you better thank your lucky stars that it wasn't a black woman who Tiger was married too. I hate racial stereotypes just as much as the next ex KKK member BUT we all know how black girls get down.
If this was a black woman, Shenaysha, Randaqua and Discombombalayniatiarnaqua would have driven by your house by now and shot bullets into your motherfucking window- that's right- they're ghetto and maybe that's what your dirty ass needs to teach you to close your legs to married men.
For those of you who have slept with married men or intend to- here's what I hope DOESN'T happen to you: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZdRN_QXvm4&feature=related
Fucking whores.
However, this incident was making spirits do all kinds of dips, flips and samurai kicks when I heard about it.
To begin with I'd like to say that violence is not gender specific, a woman beating a man is just as bad as a man beating a woman, although the outcome will always be different its just as bad.
However.
When I heard that Tiger Wood's wife may have gone Glenn Close on his ass for dickdowning some other bitches I just had to applaud and called on the spirit of Pepper Labeija to send me a hiss so wicked that even Neyo would have to step back.
When someone gets married-that person dedicates their entire being and existance to that person, they dedicate their time to that person and share aspects of their soul with that person which may be very hard to.
So when that person betrays you by fucking ANOTHER woman and THEN comes home and eats YOUR cooking and then uses YOUR pussy after he's already had some OTHER pussy I believe this causes for some Celestininity.
Celestininity is the art of making a motherfucker pay for a wrong they have commited by making life as difficult as possible for them http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PmV_vsYgPI
Only when that person is truly sorry must the Celestiniasation of that person end. The art of Celestininity is not to get your ass in trouble whilst getting your revenge, this is why Tiger Woods wife isn't all that smart.
You see, when fucking with a rich dude you must learn that the only mouth that speaks is money- hit that motherfucker where it hurts- his account!
What that hoe should have done is told that cheating scoundrel "Looky here- you done cheated on me- you better find a way to cancel our prenuptial agreement OR I will take the kids and drag your name so low even Cassie will start sucking on it."
From Tiger Woods leaked calls to one of his side pieces it is evident that his pussy stinks more than Precious' on a summers day and so the idea of losing his wife and kids would scare him shitless. He would have no choice but to comply http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8doUht3SEM , fucking bastard.
What she shouldnt have done is beat his car with one of his own clubs because that's just rude. What she should have done is hit him with a baseball bat and say "You think I don't know how to play for the other team?".
And when it comes to those cum guzzling, scandalous ass, dick inhaling, anal friendly pussy leasing stretch marked mouthed harlots who want to fuck with a married man- you better thank your lucky stars that it wasn't a black woman who Tiger was married too. I hate racial stereotypes just as much as the next ex KKK member BUT we all know how black girls get down.
If this was a black woman, Shenaysha, Randaqua and Discombombalayniatiarnaqua would have driven by your house by now and shot bullets into your motherfucking window- that's right- they're ghetto and maybe that's what your dirty ass needs to teach you to close your legs to married men.
For those of you who have slept with married men or intend to- here's what I hope DOESN'T happen to you: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZdRN_QXvm4&feature=related
Fucking whores.
Thursday, 5 November 2009
DEAR MTV
To Whom It May Concern
I am a peaceloving person, I give to charity, I put dollar bills in the collection box, I even let a homeless man eat me out when he told me hadn't had a meal in weeks. As a peaceloving person I believe that we as individuals should spread peace as easily as Alicia Keys spreads her legs.
Mtv- It's important you understand what your name is. Music. You are called Music Television, so like you are meant to be a channel which plays music.
So when two icons decide to put their creative brains together and create something amazing like let's say a music video, you would think that as a channel which calls itself Music Tv would play that video when they said they would.
It's not nice to cheat people, it's not nice to advertise falsely. How would you feel if someone promised you something for weeks and then decided not to give it to you. Huh?
YOUR ASSES BETTER HOPE I DON'T CATCH ONE OF YOUR FUCKING EMPLOYEES COS IF MY CRAZY BLACK ASS DOES I WILL CHARGE MY VIDEO PHONE IN THEIR FUCKING ANUSES YOU FUCKING LIARS. YOU FUCKIN MADE ME TAKE A DAY OFF WORK FOR THIS VIDEO JUST TO TELL ME YOUR FUCKIN ASSES ARE GOING TO AIR IT AT A LATER DATE.
YOU PUT ON THE HILLS ON TIME.
YOU GIVE DULL COUNTRY SINGERS AWARDS THEY DONT DESERVE.
YOU EVEN GIVE BRITNEY GOOD REVIEWS.
YET WHEN TWO ICONS DECIDE TO CREATE AN ICONIC MUSIC VIDEO YOU DECIDE TO TAUNT US AND MAKE US WATCH US SOME DUMASS DATING SHOW INSTEAD.
FUCK YOU MTV.
FUCK YOUR MOTHER.
FUCK YOUR SISTER.
FUCK YOUR GODDAMN NETWORK.
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE GAYS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE STANS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OF TYRA!
WE WILL COME TO YOUR HEADQUARTERS AND HISS AND SNAP AND VOGUE OUR WAYS INTO YOUR BOADROOM AND FORCE YOUR EXECUTIVES TO CHEW ALL 900,000 UNSOLD COPIES OF MISS KELLY- THE FORGOTTEN MEMBER EDITION.
Kind Regards
The Pop Whore
I am a peaceloving person, I give to charity, I put dollar bills in the collection box, I even let a homeless man eat me out when he told me hadn't had a meal in weeks. As a peaceloving person I believe that we as individuals should spread peace as easily as Alicia Keys spreads her legs.
Mtv- It's important you understand what your name is. Music. You are called Music Television, so like you are meant to be a channel which plays music.
So when two icons decide to put their creative brains together and create something amazing like let's say a music video, you would think that as a channel which calls itself Music Tv would play that video when they said they would.
It's not nice to cheat people, it's not nice to advertise falsely. How would you feel if someone promised you something for weeks and then decided not to give it to you. Huh?
YOUR ASSES BETTER HOPE I DON'T CATCH ONE OF YOUR FUCKING EMPLOYEES COS IF MY CRAZY BLACK ASS DOES I WILL CHARGE MY VIDEO PHONE IN THEIR FUCKING ANUSES YOU FUCKING LIARS. YOU FUCKIN MADE ME TAKE A DAY OFF WORK FOR THIS VIDEO JUST TO TELL ME YOUR FUCKIN ASSES ARE GOING TO AIR IT AT A LATER DATE.
YOU PUT ON THE HILLS ON TIME.
YOU GIVE DULL COUNTRY SINGERS AWARDS THEY DONT DESERVE.
YOU EVEN GIVE BRITNEY GOOD REVIEWS.
YET WHEN TWO ICONS DECIDE TO CREATE AN ICONIC MUSIC VIDEO YOU DECIDE TO TAUNT US AND MAKE US WATCH US SOME DUMASS DATING SHOW INSTEAD.
FUCK YOU MTV.
FUCK YOUR MOTHER.
FUCK YOUR SISTER.
FUCK YOUR GODDAMN NETWORK.
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE GAYS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OFF THE STANS!
YOU HAVE PISSED OF TYRA!
WE WILL COME TO YOUR HEADQUARTERS AND HISS AND SNAP AND VOGUE OUR WAYS INTO YOUR BOADROOM AND FORCE YOUR EXECUTIVES TO CHEW ALL 900,000 UNSOLD COPIES OF MISS KELLY- THE FORGOTTEN MEMBER EDITION.
Kind Regards
The Pop Whore
Make up your own fucking heading!
I won't waste time with a witty introduction or humorous haha content probably bitten off the Beyonceitis message board, I'll just hop right into this bitch.
As you know I am one of the only people in this world who appreciates how important Miss. Fenty is- in every generation there must be a pop tart who poses, gives us great tracks, has a wicked style and poses some more and her "nemesis" must be an pop artist who innovates, give us legendary tracks, has a wicked style and poses alot.
In the 80s, Madonna was that pop tart and Cyndi Lauper was that pop artist.
In the late 90s, Britney was that pop tart and Beyonce' was that pop artist.
In the noughties, Britney and Rihanna are those pop tarts and Lady Gaga and Sasha Fierce are those pop artists.
Now i'm not throwing shade on Britney or Rihanna- collecting music written by European producers whose names you can't pronounce can't be easy and going on tours where the least interesting aspect of that tour is yourself can't be easy either but for some reason we love them because in everybody's mind lies what I call The Stupido.
Whilst watching awards shows our Stupido works overtime switching itself on and off everytime a new artist gets on stage. For example, here is how the stupido will work on an upcoming award show.
8.20pm- Ciara opens up the show- (ignoro turns on)
8.35 pm- Rihanna takes to the stage to perform Pussy Like This (stupido turns on)
9.00 pm- Janet Jackson performs Michael Jackson tribute.
9.00:32pm- Beyonce' takes to the stage (stupido turns off- orgams turns on)
10pm- Lady Gaga takes to the stage (intrigue turns on)
11.00pm- Kylie Minogue takes to the stage alongside the Madonna tribute act to perform 50 Y.O (stupido turns on.)
Our Stupidos tell us there's nothing wrong with Tyra Banks defending gay people and then has Bow Wow on the show even though he hasn't got a record, cologne or height assisting machine to promote.
Our stupidos tell us that the reason your favourite artist flopped is because of lack of promotion.
Our stupidos tell us there's nothing strange about Mr.Carter signing artists who look like cheaper variations of his wife.
Our stupidos convince us that En Vogue are going to make a comeback.
However our stupidos aren't all that stupid- if they were we would have noticed that although Ciara had a record out this year she was not asked to perform at he VMAS. We use our ignoros when watching Ciara- our minds process a Ciara video or interview and then force our brains to ignore the content of that video or interview.
Yesterday, my stupido stopped working and then i just got pissed off.
Rihanna.
The Wait is Ova.
What we're we waiting for- it's not as if there's a shortage of posing foreign exports releasing songs that 11 year old girls raised on Hannah Montana think is the best thing since African dick.
I always knew Rihanna was a poser but this video took the biscuit, she didnt even bother to pretend as if she can do anything else.
In Take A Bow, she demonstrated hand-eye coordination when she was driving that nice car really really slow trying to get away from that biracial guy who runs in slow motion.
In SOS, we saw her get her Alicia Keys on and spread her legs.
In Run This Town, she even pointed.
But in The Wait is Ova- she just poses and poses and then poses some more and my stupido just didnt know what to do- my stupido only works when some effort is taken to fuel its stupidity but there was none- just posing and pussy touching.
Rihanna's new record will be hot no doubt, especially now that she's gotten so deep, I mean did you see the way she was bobbing her head and pointing at the camera- that shit is deep. However, I'm going to say this: If i was a straight male with a throbbing penis and Rihanna knocked on my door to borrow some sugar- she could get it.
As you know I am one of the only people in this world who appreciates how important Miss. Fenty is- in every generation there must be a pop tart who poses, gives us great tracks, has a wicked style and poses some more and her "nemesis" must be an pop artist who innovates, give us legendary tracks, has a wicked style and poses alot.
In the 80s, Madonna was that pop tart and Cyndi Lauper was that pop artist.
In the late 90s, Britney was that pop tart and Beyonce' was that pop artist.
In the noughties, Britney and Rihanna are those pop tarts and Lady Gaga and Sasha Fierce are those pop artists.
Now i'm not throwing shade on Britney or Rihanna- collecting music written by European producers whose names you can't pronounce can't be easy and going on tours where the least interesting aspect of that tour is yourself can't be easy either but for some reason we love them because in everybody's mind lies what I call The Stupido.
Whilst watching awards shows our Stupido works overtime switching itself on and off everytime a new artist gets on stage. For example, here is how the stupido will work on an upcoming award show.
8.20pm- Ciara opens up the show- (ignoro turns on)
8.35 pm- Rihanna takes to the stage to perform Pussy Like This (stupido turns on)
9.00 pm- Janet Jackson performs Michael Jackson tribute.
9.00:32pm- Beyonce' takes to the stage (stupido turns off- orgams turns on)
10pm- Lady Gaga takes to the stage (intrigue turns on)
11.00pm- Kylie Minogue takes to the stage alongside the Madonna tribute act to perform 50 Y.O (stupido turns on.)
Our Stupidos tell us there's nothing wrong with Tyra Banks defending gay people and then has Bow Wow on the show even though he hasn't got a record, cologne or height assisting machine to promote.
Our stupidos tell us that the reason your favourite artist flopped is because of lack of promotion.
Our stupidos tell us there's nothing strange about Mr.Carter signing artists who look like cheaper variations of his wife.
Our stupidos convince us that En Vogue are going to make a comeback.
However our stupidos aren't all that stupid- if they were we would have noticed that although Ciara had a record out this year she was not asked to perform at he VMAS. We use our ignoros when watching Ciara- our minds process a Ciara video or interview and then force our brains to ignore the content of that video or interview.
Yesterday, my stupido stopped working and then i just got pissed off.
Rihanna.
The Wait is Ova.
What we're we waiting for- it's not as if there's a shortage of posing foreign exports releasing songs that 11 year old girls raised on Hannah Montana think is the best thing since African dick.
I always knew Rihanna was a poser but this video took the biscuit, she didnt even bother to pretend as if she can do anything else.
In Take A Bow, she demonstrated hand-eye coordination when she was driving that nice car really really slow trying to get away from that biracial guy who runs in slow motion.
In SOS, we saw her get her Alicia Keys on and spread her legs.
In Run This Town, she even pointed.
But in The Wait is Ova- she just poses and poses and then poses some more and my stupido just didnt know what to do- my stupido only works when some effort is taken to fuel its stupidity but there was none- just posing and pussy touching.
Rihanna's new record will be hot no doubt, especially now that she's gotten so deep, I mean did you see the way she was bobbing her head and pointing at the camera- that shit is deep. However, I'm going to say this: If i was a straight male with a throbbing penis and Rihanna knocked on my door to borrow some sugar- she could get it.
Tuesday, 27 October 2009
I betchu wish this was 1983
I find myself learning new shit everyday.
Yesterday I learnt that if you stab Black Eyed Peas record it will start leaking strawberry scented shit.
The day before I discovered that you can't catch Aids from someone who has died from Aids and the day before that someone sent me this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5g3WpE5eWY
Just look at this fool.
You see how I'm always talking about celebrity delusion- how someone can be as shitty as shit itself yet will live their life acting as though they're that bitch because everyone around them laughs and applauds at what they do.
Bobby ain't got shit to do with this.
Your stylist is the same motherfucker who greased the stairs on the Beyonce' Experience and that "Evian" that Clive gave you wasn't Evian at all- but you can't even blame it this shit on the alcohol.
Your finished.
Instead of coming back you need to be going home.
You have been reduced to a studio singer.
You see what drugs can do a bitch kids.
You see what delusion can do to a hoe.
My mother was so embarrased by you when I showed her the link she clutched her pearls, snatched my laptop and prayed that God would bring Phyliss Hyman back from the dead (God you can ignore that part-thanks)
Imagine my horror when I watched the woman who inspired so many make a total aboffoonery of herself on FOREIGN tv, I mean its one thing to fuck up in your home because then you can enjoy respect elsewhere but like swine flu nobody wants your dirty ass anywhere.
We have to remember that what we were seeing was an image, contrived, packaged and sold to us.
Stars are just like us- they shit like YOU do, they have periods like WE do and even lust for the dick like NEYO does.
This is why you shouldn't look to stars for your answers because they're too busy trying to figure out what they need to figure out.
I am aware that Beyonce' fakes her smiles when asked whether she'll be spitting or swallowing.
I am aware that Lady Gaga sometimes looks in the mirror and wonders what life without make up is like and I am aware that Michael Jackson was a moonwalking, kindergaten stalking bleached pervert.
You need to look within yourselves for the answers and realize that YOU DO NOT KNOW your favourite artists, think about the city you're from and the city that you're favourite artist is from- if that artist wasn't an artist would you even know they existed and EVEN if you are from the same city, do you know EVERYSINGLE person in that city. The sooner we realize that stars are nothing but images being created by experts who think they know what we think we need the sooner we'll stop having debates about Michael Jacksons innocence and whether Rihanna can deepthroat or not.
Bye.
Yesterday I learnt that if you stab Black Eyed Peas record it will start leaking strawberry scented shit.
The day before I discovered that you can't catch Aids from someone who has died from Aids and the day before that someone sent me this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5g3WpE5eWY
Just look at this fool.
You see how I'm always talking about celebrity delusion- how someone can be as shitty as shit itself yet will live their life acting as though they're that bitch because everyone around them laughs and applauds at what they do.
Bobby ain't got shit to do with this.
Your stylist is the same motherfucker who greased the stairs on the Beyonce' Experience and that "Evian" that Clive gave you wasn't Evian at all- but you can't even blame it this shit on the alcohol.
Your finished.
Instead of coming back you need to be going home.
You have been reduced to a studio singer.
You see what drugs can do a bitch kids.
You see what delusion can do to a hoe.
My mother was so embarrased by you when I showed her the link she clutched her pearls, snatched my laptop and prayed that God would bring Phyliss Hyman back from the dead (God you can ignore that part-thanks)
Imagine my horror when I watched the woman who inspired so many make a total aboffoonery of herself on FOREIGN tv, I mean its one thing to fuck up in your home because then you can enjoy respect elsewhere but like swine flu nobody wants your dirty ass anywhere.
We have to remember that what we were seeing was an image, contrived, packaged and sold to us.
Stars are just like us- they shit like YOU do, they have periods like WE do and even lust for the dick like NEYO does.
This is why you shouldn't look to stars for your answers because they're too busy trying to figure out what they need to figure out.
I am aware that Beyonce' fakes her smiles when asked whether she'll be spitting or swallowing.
I am aware that Lady Gaga sometimes looks in the mirror and wonders what life without make up is like and I am aware that Michael Jackson was a moonwalking, kindergaten stalking bleached pervert.
You need to look within yourselves for the answers and realize that YOU DO NOT KNOW your favourite artists, think about the city you're from and the city that you're favourite artist is from- if that artist wasn't an artist would you even know they existed and EVEN if you are from the same city, do you know EVERYSINGLE person in that city. The sooner we realize that stars are nothing but images being created by experts who think they know what we think we need the sooner we'll stop having debates about Michael Jacksons innocence and whether Rihanna can deepthroat or not.
Bye.
Saturday, 10 October 2009
I Am A Woman In Love
So its happened.
My unsuspecting ass never thought I'd see the day.
The dramatic guinea pig had to quit acting class.
Semenya had to stop shaving.
Ike J-setted in his grave.
I wish I could say I was suprised by this all.
I wish I could say haha, but I can't but it seems as though I have another flop to kick.
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tESSkDz9uio
You see, when an artist is surrounded by people who continuously tell that artist that their shit is made of gold that artist will make decisions which are based on delusion rather than common sense. It's why Kelly Rowland still thinks lack of promotion is the reason for her commercial short comings and it's the reason Alicia Keys still thinks anybody is convinced by anything she does.
When an artist has a bad patch in their career and comes back succesfully, that artist may feel the need to milk the moment just in case it doesn't last. Because it doesn't last.
Memoirs Of An Imperfect Vocalist.
Memoirs of An Imperfect Icon.
Memoirs of an Imperfect Delusionist.
When you have lower first week sales than Janet Jackson you know your boat is sinking harder than Titanic with Sean Kingston on board.
Mariah fans have indeed had enough- and I've been saying that for years- when someone grows up on Vision Of Love and is then forced to accept Obsessed the immediate reaction of anybody with a head is to reject it and so they have.
Mariah has succesfully cheapened herself by having Twitter, marrying a D-Lister and creating diss tracks.
When a celebrity is mysterious and silent about certain things it creates a mystery around the artist and so the fans purchase whatever that artist puts out so they can feel as though they own a part of that artist- it's why Britney is still selling out shows.
It's why Rihanna is so sensual and so exotic.
It's why we watch Jay Z interviews, Jay Z was rapping since before I was born yet I had no interest in him until he started jizzing on Sasha's face- when we watched him on Oprah we were hoping he'd say the things Beyonce' wouldn't and the feeling the obsession we have with celebrity privacy fuels our respect for them.
When we know too much- when we know you had quasedillas for breakfast and that you and Kimora are downloading African porn whilst breastfeeding your foreign exports all the mystery your publicists spent years creating is thrown out of the window.
This is why we see nothing wrong with watching Michael Jackson interviews when we know all he ever did was lie, we knew he wasn't straight but we convinced ourselves that he was because if we denied ourselves that image of him spooning that white lady we'd have nothing else to base our love of his private life on.
Mariah dear- it's over.
Your acting career isnt going to kick off just because you got a role which doesnt require facial expression or physical movement. You are only edible in that role because you speak really really really slow meaning that every word you say is given the chance to breathe, a good actress can stammer, scream, yell and fart whilst giving a monologue
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7sIkj4nuh8
Mariah will never be able to use her name to sell anything and so now she will require flawless live shows just like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlHyN1eJgTI
My unsuspecting ass never thought I'd see the day.
The dramatic guinea pig had to quit acting class.
Semenya had to stop shaving.
Ike J-setted in his grave.
I wish I could say I was suprised by this all.
I wish I could say haha, but I can't but it seems as though I have another flop to kick.
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tESSkDz9uio
You see, when an artist is surrounded by people who continuously tell that artist that their shit is made of gold that artist will make decisions which are based on delusion rather than common sense. It's why Kelly Rowland still thinks lack of promotion is the reason for her commercial short comings and it's the reason Alicia Keys still thinks anybody is convinced by anything she does.
When an artist has a bad patch in their career and comes back succesfully, that artist may feel the need to milk the moment just in case it doesn't last. Because it doesn't last.
Memoirs Of An Imperfect Vocalist.
Memoirs of An Imperfect Icon.
Memoirs of an Imperfect Delusionist.
When you have lower first week sales than Janet Jackson you know your boat is sinking harder than Titanic with Sean Kingston on board.
Mariah fans have indeed had enough- and I've been saying that for years- when someone grows up on Vision Of Love and is then forced to accept Obsessed the immediate reaction of anybody with a head is to reject it and so they have.
Mariah has succesfully cheapened herself by having Twitter, marrying a D-Lister and creating diss tracks.
When a celebrity is mysterious and silent about certain things it creates a mystery around the artist and so the fans purchase whatever that artist puts out so they can feel as though they own a part of that artist- it's why Britney is still selling out shows.
It's why Rihanna is so sensual and so exotic.
It's why we watch Jay Z interviews, Jay Z was rapping since before I was born yet I had no interest in him until he started jizzing on Sasha's face- when we watched him on Oprah we were hoping he'd say the things Beyonce' wouldn't and the feeling the obsession we have with celebrity privacy fuels our respect for them.
When we know too much- when we know you had quasedillas for breakfast and that you and Kimora are downloading African porn whilst breastfeeding your foreign exports all the mystery your publicists spent years creating is thrown out of the window.
This is why we see nothing wrong with watching Michael Jackson interviews when we know all he ever did was lie, we knew he wasn't straight but we convinced ourselves that he was because if we denied ourselves that image of him spooning that white lady we'd have nothing else to base our love of his private life on.
Mariah dear- it's over.
Your acting career isnt going to kick off just because you got a role which doesnt require facial expression or physical movement. You are only edible in that role because you speak really really really slow meaning that every word you say is given the chance to breathe, a good actress can stammer, scream, yell and fart whilst giving a monologue
http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7sIkj4nuh8
Mariah will never be able to use her name to sell anything and so now she will require flawless live shows just like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlHyN1eJgTI
Monday, 5 October 2009
That baby should jus' go head and abort itself
Ive been told by my pimp that I beat around the bush so Im just going to hop right in on it like my name is motherfucking Tigger-however instead of TTFN I will say TTTS (Time To Throw Shade.)
If MTO are correct (lawfagivemefareferencingthosehoes) and Mathew is indeed the father of a child which is to be conceived by some bafoon- I want to everyone to know that as long as Beyonce' uses Ciara's album booklet as a period pad Mathew and the supposed mother will NEVER find peace.
That baby might as well take its umbilical cord and hang itself if it is Mathews because we Sasha Fierce Representatives will NEVER accept a Knowles unless it is made up of the spicy womb of Celestine and the ATM dick of Mathew.
If all this is true- Juelz will have an uncle younger than him
Juelz dont play that.
Juelz dont even respect the niggers that work the rides at the fair- you think hes going to accept some illegit?
And to the trollope herself- so I guess you thought you were going to conceive the secomd Beyonce'- BY GOD I hope you conceive a 45th Gary Coleman.
And Celestine- for your sake I hope this isnt true- I am part Haitain myself and I know how much vengeance potions cost too make, if Mathew did indeed dick down that whore then I want you to know that I will create an entire blog documenting your life as a single gal about town and your endevours with men much younger than yourself.
I'll call it:
Celes-Teen.
If MTO are correct (lawfagivemefareferencingthosehoes) and Mathew is indeed the father of a child which is to be conceived by some bafoon- I want to everyone to know that as long as Beyonce' uses Ciara's album booklet as a period pad Mathew and the supposed mother will NEVER find peace.
That baby might as well take its umbilical cord and hang itself if it is Mathews because we Sasha Fierce Representatives will NEVER accept a Knowles unless it is made up of the spicy womb of Celestine and the ATM dick of Mathew.
If all this is true- Juelz will have an uncle younger than him
Juelz dont play that.
Juelz dont even respect the niggers that work the rides at the fair- you think hes going to accept some illegit?
And to the trollope herself- so I guess you thought you were going to conceive the secomd Beyonce'- BY GOD I hope you conceive a 45th Gary Coleman.
And Celestine- for your sake I hope this isnt true- I am part Haitain myself and I know how much vengeance potions cost too make, if Mathew did indeed dick down that whore then I want you to know that I will create an entire blog documenting your life as a single gal about town and your endevours with men much younger than yourself.
I'll call it:
Celes-Teen.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)